Monday, August 24, 2015

WWE SummerSlam 2015 was Better Than WrestleMania 31

Sometimes it pays to have low expectations.  Case in point, last night's SummerSlam extravaganza.  I went into this show with the mindset of "I'll be content as long as I don't feel like my night was wasted," and what I got was a consistently very entertaining wrestling show with a ton of variety where every match felt like it got enough time, and a few actually stood out.


The much-dreaded-by-me Brock Lesnar-Undertaker main event was easily the best match delivered by these two since their No Mercy 2002 Hell in a Cell.  It was streamlined, hard-hitting, full of nice little nuances (the double situp for example), and while the ending left me baffled at first, once the replay explained everything I actually kinda liked it.  Granted we've been conditioned that the timekeeper never rings the bell until the official calls for it, but in all these years you'd think human error would get in the way at least once.  Well, last night was that one occurrence.  Taker tapped out and the timekeeper jumped the gun.  It was a realistic screwup and hopefully WWE follows up on it by having The Authority discipline said timekeeper on RAW.  Moreover, it protects Lesnar as an unstoppable monster, sets up the inevitable "rubber match" at WrestleMania, and reframes this feud with Taker playing more of a heel (don't get me wrong, getting a Dallas crowd to boo Taker is going to be impossible, but still).  I liked this match a lot, and the lasting image for me will be of the defiant Lesnar flipping Taker off just before passing out to Hell's Gate.

Thursday, August 20, 2015

WWE SummerSlam 2015 Predictions!!!

Well folks it's that time again.  The tentpole PPV of the summer is upon us, and the 2015 edition is SUUUUUUUUUUUPER-SIZED!!!!  That's right, this year's SummerSlam is a four-hour spectacular loaded up with ten, count them, TEN big matches.  And since it's in a normal arena as opposed to a MegaUltraDome, the entrances hopefully won't be taking up half the show like they do at WrestleMania.  Also celebrity wrestling fan Jon Stewart is hosting the show.  While I don't get why a PPV needs a host (Isn't that why the announcers are there?), I'm a Stewart fan and he's a wrestling fan, so hopefully his involvement will be entertaining.



So let's get to the business of prognosticatin', shall we?  As always my associate Dan Moore will give his picks too.

Currently Dan is beating me, for the first time since we started this tradition.  I gotta step it up.  Dan: 28/43, Justin: 26/43


Four-way WWE Tag Team Title Match: Prime Time Players vs. The New Day vs. Lucha Dragons vs. Los Matadores

Wednesday, August 19, 2015

Dan's Top 9: TV Shows to Watch While Boozing

Welcome to another edition of Dan's Top 9.  It's a countdown.  Written by Dan.  No explanation needed.   Done.

 DAN'S TOP

Booze. It's what makes the world go 'round. Whether out at the bar drinking a dozen or so beers with friends or sneaking a bottle of Mad Dog into a christening, booze makes everything better.  However, there are times where you don't wanna see the light of day or interact with other humans when you're drinking. For those times, I present to you the best programs on television to watch when you're drinking that thirty pack alone.



9. Nature Programs: The tranquil sounds of planet earth make for a lovely companion as you sip down Jack & Diets (I'm watching my figure). Also good for a laugh when you come upon some endangered species doing it. Ever watch rhinos bang when you're hammered? It's fucking HILARIOUS.

Tuesday, August 18, 2015

A Newbie's Take on NJPW G1 Climax 25

Well folks, the G1 Climax 25 tournament has come and gone, and it is now time for post-G1 depression.  Sigh.....

Anywho, this being my first G1 tourney as a New Japan fan (or as my wife would call me, a "Jeezus, wouldya shut up about New Japan already??"), I thought I'd throw together a quick write-up about the experience.


The G1 tournament is of course New Japan's annual round-robin tournament to determine the #1 Contender at next year's WrestleKingdom PPV.  So it's like the Royal Rumble except waaaaaay more intensive.  The number of participants varies year to year, as does the schedule.  Whereas the last few tourneys have consisted of entire cards of G1 matches (which I loved because it meant multiple full shows of excellent singles bouts), the 2015 edition was more spread out to give the guys more time to recover from each match.  This year there were 19 total dates including the Finals, and each "regular season" show only featured five tourney matches from one block at a time.  This layout definitely made it easier to keep up if your goal was to only watch the G1 matches, as the first half of each show consisted of multi-man tag bouts to warm up the crowd.  The downside of course is that there wasn't a full show on the level of last year's Day 7 (considered by most to be the best NJPW show of the year).  Still the 2015 G1 tourney had a helluvalotta good-to-great matches and built to an absolutely fantastic peak with the "semi-finals" and the Finals show.

Pro Wrestling: A Mark's History, part 10 (The New WWF Generation)

As 1994 began, multiple top heroes were being positioned to challenge Yokozuna for the WWF Title.  Chief among them were former champ Bret Hart, Lex Luger, and after two years wading around the midcard pool fighting off silly cartoon villains, The Undertaker was finally being pushed as a top challenger. 

He would wrestle Yoko at the '94 Rumble in a casket match, and at the time I really thought he might take it down.  Unfortunately Taker needed some time off and he lost to the Champion with the help of 10 (ten!) midcard heels, in one of the worst matches I've ever seen.  Seriously, this thing stunk worse than a Taco Bell Chalupa fart.  Even worse was the goofy post-match angle, where Taker "disappeared" from the casket, appeared as a ghost on the TitanTron, and "floated" up to the ceiling (in fact it was Marty Janetty in Taker's costume who was the floating stunt double - I mean couldn't they have found anyone close to Taker's size for this job??).

Yup, Yokozuna looks how I felt watching this snorefest.

The Rumble match itself ended for the first time with co-winners, as Bret Hart and Lex Luger tumbled over the ropes simultaneously.  This meant that at WrestleMania X Yokozuna would have to defend the Title twice.  Luger won the coin toss for the first crack at the Champ, while Bret would face his estranged brother Owen before getting his shot.

These two matches, coupled with the possibility of a Bret vs. Luger main event, and the Shawn Michaels-Razor Ramon I-C Title match, made WrestleMania X a must-see event for me.  This was the first WrestleMania I had ever ordered on PPV, and man did I pick a good one!

I was actually shocked when Luger failed to win the Title, as I figured the months-long build from the summer of '93 would result in Luger finally climbing the mountain.  I was pretty pissed when he got disqualified and ousted from the Title hunt, and of course it was then a forgone conclusion that Bret would be regaining the belt in the main event.  To this day, with all due respect to Yokozuna, I still think Bret vs. Luger would've been a spectacular match and I consider it a lost opportunity that it never happened.  When Bret predictably won the Title back, I was happy for him and knew he was deserving, but I wasn't overly excited about it.

Wednesday, August 5, 2015

Deflategate: Why Are We Still Talking About This?

Editor's Note: Dan's pissed.  And rightfully so....

The New England Patriots have been mired in a 'controversy' of the NFL's making. During the AFC Championship game, some footballs were found to be significantly deflated of air. Or they weren't. Depending on which lie in the Wells Report you want to believe. But clearly the air gauge they used to measure the PSI showed this, right? Depends on which air gauge the Wells Report wants to tell us the refs used. The whole thing is a blueprint on how not to investigate something. The lack of science, the omission of facts and the complete keystone cops atmosphere of this would be hilarious if it weren't so frustrating.

Pictured: Feeding time at the NFL Office

Yesterday the testimony from Tom Brady's appeal hearing was released and...wow. Does it paint quite the bad picture for the NFL. There's quite a few takeaways from it. Here's a few thoughts.

1. JOHN HARBAUGH IS A LIAR 

For months, it's been rumored the Baltimore Ravens tipped off the Indianapolis Colts about some shenanigans with Patriots footballs. Ravens Head Coach Harbaugh has vehemently denied this.


Yesterday's release shows otherwise. The Special Teams coordinator from the Ravens called Colts Coach Chuck Pagano about something screwy with the kicking balls (which, by the way, are never touched by game day staff until they hit the field. Those are issued straight out of box by NFL referees). Now, maybe you can make the argument that Harbaugh didn't know this but then that means one of two things

A) Harbaugh has no control over his staff and they do whatever they want, including going over his head and talking to other organizations

B) Harbaugh knew and blatantly lied, repeatedly.

You make the call.


2.  TROY VINCENT IS A HYPOCRITE

Vincent is currently the NFL executive vice president of football operations. He is also, by all accounts, the most hypocritty hypocrite of all time. Tom Brady has been suspended four games for most likely being generally aware that some footballs were probably tampered with but maybe not because SCIENCE. But Aaron Rodgers, Pro Bowl QB for the Green Bay Packers, actually said he likes to push the limits of the PSI levels in the footballs. Not generally aware. He told this to broadcaster Phil Simms, who quoted this on an NFL broadcast.



Not only was this laughed about, it's not even a blip on the NFL's discipline radar. As pointed out yesterday from Stephanie Stradley, a lawyer from Houston with no horse in this race (follow her on Twitter @StephStradley, she's brilliant), this didn't even register as even a minor faux pas for Vincent or the NFL.

Rodgers specifically said he likes to push the limits of the air pressure in footballs, and nothing. Brady might be generally aware that some other guy maybe fiddled with some game equipment, four game suspension. Yeah, makes sense.


3. ROGER GOODELL IS AN IDIOT

Throughout the whole testimony, Goodell constantly butts in to get reassurances for answers that are in plain English. Or he has no idea what the word 'Yes' means.


He lacks any kind of reasoning and seems to not understand how language or the world in general works. He asks about Brady getting rid of his phone (by the way, Goodell introduced the word "destroyed." Nowhere does Brady say this. That language was introduced by Rog and told to the public to make him sound guilty) and seems to have no clue what a phone is or how it works.


Evidently, Big Rog thinks cell phones are owned and operated by the Mission: Impossible crew. This is the guy in charge of the biggest sports entity in the world.

This whole Deflategate nonsense has been a sham and a witch hunt from the get-go. It's an embarrassment for Goodell, Brady, the Patriots and all of the NFL. The sooner Brady is exonerated and plays in week one, the sooner we can all forget this and watch some football again. Like we all want to.

Tuesday, August 4, 2015

A "Rowdy" Roddy Piper Remembrance

(Editor's Note: I thought I'd defer to my associate Dan Moore to say a few words about the passing of Roddy Piper.  While I was obviously a fan of the Hot Rod, Dan admired him on a different level.  So it only seemed right for him to take the lead on this one.)


I grew up in a household that watched and tolerated wrestling to different degrees. My father went to live events with his buddies a lot. My mother used to let me, my older sister and younger brother stay up past our bedtime to watch Prime Time Wrestling, the precursor to RAW. She didn't mind wrestling but didn't much pay attention either. Around the corner was my Aunt Patty and my cousin John Michael who was like a big brother to us.  He watched all the time and tried out his wrestling moves on us much smaller kids. Auntie paid attention to varying degrees. But there was one wrestler everyone that all of us agreed was can't miss television: The Hot Rod was the best.

I was seven when WrestleMania came around back in 1985. That was back in the day when there were clear cut good guys and bad guys. My childhood brain loved the Hulkster, Junkyard Dog and Hillbilly Jim. I obviously hated King Kong Bundy and Greg "The Hammer" Valentine. They were jerks and cheats.

Thursday, July 30, 2015

Dan Moore & the Terrible, Horrible, No Good, Very Bad Twenty Minutes

Hey, how'd your morning go?  Oh great, grand, I DONT CARE. This is how my day started.


That's me, under the elephant.

A little background here. I live with my girlfriend in a suburb of Boston with our dog and cat. The dog's a little fella and the cat is an orange furball of fury. He's great. (Editor's Note: False - that cat's a regular asshole.  And I love cats.)

Anyway, our dryer went on the fritz the other day. It's a real pain in the ass walking down to the basement to throw clothes into a dryer that doesn't work. So instead of forking out the cash for a new one, we called a repair man. Had I known the turmoil this guy's visit would cause, I woulda Kramer'd my clothes and put them in the oven.

Wednesday, July 29, 2015

Pro Wrestling: A Mark's History, part 9 (Lex Express)

In January 1993, for the second time in a row, I ordered a WWF PPV event.  The WWF Title match of Bret Hart vs. new top heel Razor Ramon interested me, as did the annual Rumble match despite the lack of star-power (What's the opposite of star-studded?  Star-missing?). 

But the big match for me that night was I-C Champion Shawn Michaels finally facing his former tag partner Marty Janetty.  This feud was a full year in the making, as Shawn had turned on Marty in January 1992 by superkicking him and ramming him head-first through a plate-glass window.  This was probably the most violent heel turn I had ever seen at that time and it immediately forced the audience to sit up and take notice of Shawn.  Still one of the most brilliantly-executed heel turns in the history of the biz.  Keeping Marty off TV for a year was genius too, as it added weight to Shawn's attack and made the eventual feud much more personal.

That's gonna leave a mark....

The Rumble '93 event was shockingly good considering how it looks now on paper.  I'll still dust this one off and watch it from time to time.  The Steiners made their WWF PPV debut in the opener against the Beverly Brothers - solid tag bout there.  Shawn vs. Marty was a damn good Intercontinental Title match, though it had less high-flying than I would've expected.  The Bret-Razor match was excellent and got both guys over.  Even in defeat, Razor looked like a million bucks.  There was even a Bam Bam Bigelow-Big Bossman match that was better than it had any right to be.

Tuesday, July 28, 2015

You Used to Be Sooooo Good: Summer Blockbusters


Today, my esteemed colleague Jingles and I, Dan Moore, will be discussing the disturbing trend of what was once our favorite popcorn eating time of year, summer, and how it has turned into a wasteland of special effects laden tripe on the big screen.
The Summer Blockbuster Season:  You Used to Be Soooo Good


JUSTIN: So, the summer blockbuster.  Yeah what's happened?  Summer movies are no longer allowed to be fun, are they?  Everything has to be deadly serious and feature wall-to-wall explosions to the point that you're just numb to the whole experience, like being smashed in the face with a hammer 600 times in a row.  By the end you don't feel anything, and you just wanna go home and curl up in a fetal position on the bathroom floor.

1980s summer movies conveyed a tone of adventure, wonder, and even comedy.  Indiana Jones for example had a ton of action set pieces but they were simple, easy to follow, and done with a sense of humor.  Action sequences now have to depict CGI armageddon and each scene has to be 25 minutes long.
Man of Steel......and Disaster Porn
There's no such thing as a fun little summer action movie anymore, they're all EPIC EVENT PICTURES.  The scope of all these films has to be as huge as possible so they're bigger than every other epic event picture.  And they must all cost over $200 mil and feature entire cities being destroyed.

Friday, July 24, 2015

Hulk Hogan's Rock N-Wording

Well it's come out that Terry Bollea has been fired from his WWE Legends deal over some alleged racist comments he made, that were captured on tape (Yeah, I still say "on tape," sue me).

***NOTE: My friend Travis came up with the title of this piece.  Credit where credit's due.***

I'm not here to take a side (but screw Terry, that racist prick); rather I'm here to share some amusing thoughts my friends have offered on the subject.  Be warned, they're basically all in very poor taste, and in no way represent the views of Enuffa.com or any of its subsidiaries.  Christ, I gotta get a better class of friends.....

The One Thing Wrong With Pixels, by Dan Moore

I'd rather watch this for two hours

(Note: I have not seen this movie nor do I ever intend to. It looks horrible and at this point any Adam Sandler flick should be out out to pasture. There are most likely millions of things wrong with this garbage movie, but this one bothers me)

The premise of 'Pixels' at least sounded like a decent idea until I found out it was a Sandler flick.  Then I lost all interest. A group of aliens disguise themselves as classic 80s arcade characters to destroy Earth. It's up to former video game champions Sandler, Peter Dinklage (why Tyrion,WHY!?!?!) and Kevin James, playing the most unlikely President of the Unites States EVER (Also a bit of a step down from being the King of Queens, eh your majesty?).

Wednesday, July 22, 2015

Pro Wrestling: A Mark's History, part 8 (Bret Wins the Big One)

The WWF started 1992 off amid a hugely memorable angle.  The World Title was vacated at the end of '91, stemming from a pair of (unwatchably terrible) matches between Hulk Hogan and the Undertaker, both of which ended in controversy.  WWF President Jack Tunney held up the Title and declared that the winner of the '92 Royal Rumble would be crowned the new Champion, thus making this the most important Rumble match in the event's history.

The company pulled out all the stops for this one, stacking the Rumble match with all the top contenders - Hogan, Flair, Taker, Savage, Sid, Jake, Piper.  They made sure to ramp up the unpredictability of who would walk out with the belt.  In the end of course it was a gutsy 60+ minute performance by Ric Flair that earned him the WWF Championship.  I was absolutely stoked!  Flair was the guy I was rooting for but I wasn't sure they'd pull the trigger on a Title run for him.

Awesome thing I never thought I'd see #1. 
BTW how tiny does that belt look
when compared to Flair's Big Gold Belt?

Following the Rumble was the press conference where Tunney would announce Flair's challenger at WrestleMania, and predictably Hulk Hogan was originally the choice (which I found idiotic - Hogan wasn't even the last guy eliminated from the Rumble match).  This would all be used as a way to set up the Hogan-Sid feud however, and on Saturday Night's Main Event they more or less recreated the Hogan-Savage angle from 1989 by having Sid abandon Hogan mid-match and turn heel. 

Monday, July 20, 2015

WWE Battleground Thoughts, or What Did I Just Watch??

WWE Battleground has come and gone, and I'm trying to assemble some pattern of logic for how it ended.  Still can't do it.  I found the booking of that main event baffling for so many reasons.  I've presented those reasons below, but first a few words about the rest of the PPV:

John Cena and Kevin Owens once again stole the show with a fantastic semi-main event.  I think Owens should've gone over here, because unless WWE Creative figures out things like proper follow-through (spoiler alert: they haven't), Owens could get lost in the shuffle like Rusev and Wyatt did after feuding with Cena.  Randy Orton vs. Sheamus was the second-best match of the night but their opener was lacking a bit of urgency.  Still, well-worked.  Reigns vs. Wyatt was a very good 16-minute match but unfortunately it was stretched over 22 minutes.  Reigns now seems so far away from being the next top guy it's just become sad.  The Divas 3-way was solid and considerably better than most main roster Divas matches, but nowhere near what the NXT women are capable of.  The Tag Title match was too short to amount to much and I'm still not sure why The New Day didn't get to keep the belts long-term.  Imagine a Honky Tonk Man-type reign with those guys.  It'd be gold.

Okay, now for that main event.  Lesnar and Rollins were on their way to a very good match, but at the nine-minute mark, Mark showed up.  Fuckin' Mark.....  As I said, there are several reasons I don't like this booking.  I've presented six of them.

Wait, what happened to the match I was just watching?

Thursday, July 16, 2015

WWE Battleground 2015 Predictions!!!

And we're back for another set of official Enuffa.com WWE PPV Predictions!

This Sunday is the annual B-level PPV, Battleground, which this year is actually pretty stacked.  The 2013 and 2014 editions were widely considered the worst WWE shows of those respective years but with Brock Lesnar being included this time, there's a chance for the 2015 edition to be a solid outing.  The WWE product has been stagnant as ever of late, but there have been a few bright spots such as the US Title scene, the return of Brock Lesnar, and a smattering of NXT stars.  So there's certainly no shortage of talent on the roster, it's just up to Creative to properly use what they have, which they rarely ever do.



So let's get to predictin'.  Justin and Dan are currently tied for the 2015 season, 24/37.


Pre-Show Match: King Barrett vs. R-Truth


Jeezus H. Christ, can we put this feud to bed already?  No one cares, and you've succeeded in killing Barrett dead with the stupid King gimmick.  Don't bring back the KOTR tournament if winning it actually HURTS a guy's career.  Fortunately this match is for the Crown, so maybe Truth will relieve Barrett of that albatross and he can go back to delivering Bad News.

Wednesday, July 15, 2015

Pro Wrestling: A Mark's History, part 7 (The Year I Almost Quit)

As 1991 began, one of the big two wrestling promotions (AWA had folded in 1990 so it was really down to the WWF and the NWA, who soon became WCW officially) was stuck in a major creative rut and riding on fumes from the 80s, and the other was trying in vain to reinvent the wheel.

January 19, 1991 was significant for me because it marked the first WWF PPV I ever ordered, the 1991 Royal Rumble.  Why I picked that particular event to order after four years as a WWF fan I'm not sure, but I was excitedly hoping either Randy Savage, Undertaker, Hawk or Animal would win the Rumble match itself (This was before the Rumble winner automatically got a WWF Title shot so it was still anyone's ballgame).  Much to my dismay Hogan won it for the second straight year (yawn) and even worse, Sgt. Slaughter of all people won the WWF Title.  I figured we'd be getting a Warrior-Hogan rematch at WrestleMania, so it was mindboggling to me that Slaughter took the belt.  It was the first time I remember feeling like a championship had really been devalued - this long irrelevant, marginally talented 80s midcarder just waltzes in and wins the top championship in under six months??  Needless to say the '91 Rumble was and is not one of my favorite PPV events and it would be nearly two years before I ordered another one.

Yup, this actually happened.

Why they felt a cartoonish drill sargeant turned Iraqi sympathizer would draw huge money I'll never know.  But they cast their lot with the exploitation of the Persian Gulf War by pitting turncoat Slaughter against "Real American" Hulk Hogan at WrestleMania.  This was literally the least interested I had ever been in a PPV match.  Not surprisingly ticket sales for the event slumped and a lackluster 'Mania ensued. 

Monday, July 13, 2015

You Used to Be Sooooo Good: Superman Movies


Welcome back to another edition of You Used to Be Soooo Good, where Justin & I, Dan Moore, discuss things used to be awesome but now, eh, not so much. This week we discuss the FIRST superhero, the big blue boy scout, your favorite alien and mine, Superman, and how his cinematic exploits used to be great but now, not so much.

        Superman Movies:  You Used to Be Soooo Good

My God, LOOK AT HIM

DAN: Ah, the wonder of Superman movies. The man in blue flying heroically through the sky. There used to not be a superhero movie coming out every week. There was nary a special effects spectacular starring a comic book hero in theaters. It used to be Superman…and that was it for a loooong time.

Thursday, July 9, 2015

Dan's Top 9: One-Time Seinfeld Characters

Welcome to another edition of Dan's Top 9, where my associate Dan Moore counts down his favorite 9 something-or-others.....



Seinfeld is the greatest sitcom of all time. About this, there can be no debate. Some people argue that there were better sitcoms in the past but it's an argument I can't listen to. I can't, I won't. The main cast was perfect, but the supporting characters also added to the show's greatness. Besides recurring characters like Newman and Puddy, there were some classic one-time characters on the show. Without further ado, here they are. I'm not counting the finale as the second appearance of these characters because it was a glorified clip show. So if you wanna cry about it? That's a shame.


9. Paul O'Neil

I'm from Boston, so I hate the Yankees. And growing up my cousin, John Michael, had an unnatural hatred for Paul O'Neil. I inherited that hate as well. Until he showed up in "The Wink." Kramer barges in on O'Neill, trying to get him to hit two dingers for a dying kid and O'Neill acts the only way a normal person in that situation would: by saying no one's dumb enough to promise two homers and wondering how the hell Cosmo got into the the Yankee clubhouse. Perfect reactions from a most hated Yankee.


He just needs to catch a pop fly in his hat


8. Joe Mayo

Do me a favor when you read this article, can you hit Ctrl-C to copy the article and send it to your friends, thanks! Fuckin' Mayo, ordering guests around at his party. His one saving grace is his Dr. Zaius man fur jacket.


BOSS



7. Todd Gack

Sure, this guy is a slimeball, but to be fair, Gack (I think that's Dutch) has the perfect system on how to get chicks. Make a bet you know you'll lose to take them out on dates. It's brilliant in its simplicity. With this system, he not only beds Elaine (you know they humped, she's loose) but also got Nicki, who is arguably Jerry's hottest girlfriend in the show. Good work, Gack.


Mmmmmmm.....Nicki


6. Meelosh

A hack of a tennis pro who decides that instead of letting his awful racket play be known, decides to dabble in the flesh trade. By trading his wife's...services to Jerry to keep his mouth shut, Meelosh becomes the first and only sex slave trader in this show's history! Good work. Coupled with his bad tennis and hilarious, over the top Russian accent, Meelosh holds a special place in my heart.


5. The Bubble Boy

Everything, I mean, EVERYTHING the bubble boy says is goddamn hilarious. A jaded, spoiled twenty-something stuck in a bubble (I thought it was like an igloo), he gets a glimpse of Costanza's chick and immediately asks her to take her top off. She scoffs, and he hits her with 'COME OOOOOON'. And even that didn't work. Susan sure was stuck up.  And then he loses Trivial Pursuit on a misprint. "Moops" my ass.


4. Marcelino

Cockfighting. Find another show that bases an episode's plot on illegal bird battles. You never will. And Marcelino was the kingpin. The owner of the bodega with another over-the-top accent. His pronunciations are hilarious, as is his request for a goddamn bird to take a dive in a fight. Brilliant.

Shop keeper by day, poultry pugilist by night.


3. Jiffy Park/Jiffy Dump guy

Yea, this is kind of a cheat as this guy was in two episodes, but I believe they were twin brothers, not the same character, so there ya go.  But I can't help it. The delivery of this guy's lines is impeccable. George parks his car in his lot which is being used as a mobile whore house. George finds a prophylactic in the car, confronts the guy. And then the guy hits us with one of the great throwaway lines in the show's history.

http://youtu.be/Oz0jkktVfJ8
First ten seconds of this clip is gold, Jerry. GOLD


2. Soup Nazi

He had to be on the list. Sure, he's overplayed and everyone says "No soup for you!" to this day. But he's a classic. Yev Kassem (his real name) is as iconic as any main character from the show. His soup recipes are perfect, evidently his bread is quite good and his furniture choices are also impeccable. He's a true Renaissance man.


1. Lt. Bookman

Could it be anyone else, joy boy? Philip Baker Hall KILLS this role. A lifetime library cop out for Jerry's blood for a long overdue book. His seriousness, his menacing looks, his line delivery all combine to make the perfect Seinfeld guest star. When my friends and I watch his performance, we use our pee pees and wee wees to wet our pants.  Undeniably the greatest guest star on the greatest show ever. Thanks for reading this list. I gotta get outta here to get my kicks, me and all my good time buddies. 

If you screw up again, he'll be all over you
like a pit bull on a poodle

Tuesday, July 7, 2015

Pro Wrestling: A Mark's History, part 6 (From Awesome to Boring)

January 1990 saw the NWA at the top of its game, with Ric Flair having vanquished the challenge of Terry Funk and seemingly moving onto a feud with rising heel Lex Luger.  Sting had just won the Starrcade Iron Man tournament and joined the newly reformed Four Horsemen, and was poised to become a full-fledged main eventer. The Steiners stood atop the burgeoning Tag division that included The Road Warriors, Doom, and The Skyscrapers, and The Midnight Express was rekindling their longtime feud with the returning Rock & Roll Express. 

Everything was going well, then suddenly the World Title picture seemed to shift completely away from babyface Flair vs. heel Luger, in favor of heel Flair vs. Sting (something we had seen already, brought on by a heel turn that came out of left field).  So now Sting would be the #1 challenger to Flair's Title and heel U.S. Champion Luger would be moved back into the midcard.  I was baffled and furious at this turn of events as I thought 1990 would finally be Luger's year, and we'd see the company take more risks like they had in '89.  But instead they played it completely safe and everything seemed to reboot to the 1988 Four Horsemen era. 

Then an abrupt injury threw a wrench into their plans as Sting hurt his knee and would be out of action for six months.  Heel Luger was moved into the #1 contender spot to challenge heel Flair.  Oh good.  So now there was no protagonist in this feud at all.  The ensuing Flair-Luger showdown at WrestleWar '90 ended up being a very good, epic match that involved Luger's "redemption" back into a babyface (only about 8 months after he turned heel).  Sting appeared at ringside to support Luger in the match, and then the Andersons showed up to attack him.  Then came one of the stupidest match endings I'd ever seen.

Come on, Luger was pretty badass in 1990

Monday, July 6, 2015

NJPW Dominion was All Kinds of Awesome

Well another New Japan PPV is in the books folks, and what a helluva show it was.  I just wanted to throw my two cents in about yesterday's Dominion PPV, so bear with me for a few moments.


Dominion was in my estimation the second-best PPV of 2015 so far, behind January's WrestleKingdom 9 (upon which I've heaped mountains of praise HERE).  Of the nine matches only two could be considered weak, and even those weren't bad at all.  The two headlining matches both fell in the four-star range, while several others were approaching that territory.  It's staggering how much better New Japan's product is than that of any other wrestling promotion right now.  Incidentally I went 8 for 9 in my predictions despite having only been a NJPW fan for six months, which I attribute to Jado and Gedo's booking being logical, concise, and satisfying.

The show opened with another wild, fast-paced offering from the Jr. Heavyweight Tag division, as The Young Bucks defended their Titles against reDRagon and RPG Vice.  While these matches won't ever be called epic examples of storytelling, they're always a highly entertaining way to dip your feet in the water.

Next up was one of the weaker matches of the night; Bad Luck Fale and Yujiro Takahashi vs. Tomoaki Honma and Tetsuya Naito.  This wasn't a bad match but the real story here was Naito's gradual heel turn.  He sauntered down to the ring, in no hurry to help out his partner who was being ambushed by the two Bullet Club members, and even refused to tag into the match until very late.  Eventually Honma got the surprise win, but Naito bailed immediately after the closing bell.  It'll be interesting to see where they go with this - Naito's been a pretty bland babyface character for so long, so a heel turn could be just what he needs to get to the next level.  It's nice to see Honma finally getting some kind of a push, as he's really fun to watch and super over.

The "stacked" portion of the card began next with the Shibata-Sakuraba fight.  And I mean FIGHT.  This was one of the best simulated MMA bouts I've ever seen and I'd rank it right up there with Sakuraba-Nakamura from WK7.  The grappling looked totally convincing and snug, and Shibata's strikes were brutal.  Sakuraba dominated the match with some amazing submissions, clinging to Shibata like a spider monkey, until finally Shibata broke free and took the match with the Penalty Kick.  Great fight.

Thursday, July 2, 2015

NJPW Dominion 2015 Predictions!!

Welcome to the first-ever Enuffa.com New Japan PPV prediction column!  Those of you who already read my stuff know that I started drinking the NJPW Kool-Aid about six months ago and goddamn it's the most delicious beverage I've had in a long time.


This Sunday is the big Dominion PPV, and since a) I've become such a fan of this company and b) this is on paper the most stacked card so far in 2015, I thought I'd expand my prognostication wheelhouse to include major New Japan events.  I probably won't be quite as accurate as I am with WWE since I'm a pretty new fan and am not privy to the same backstage information or storyline/promo segments with NJPW.  But what the hey, let's give it a shot, no?

New Japan's WrestleKingdom 9 show is by far the PPV to beat in 2015, but if any show is going to top that one, it could very well be Dominion.  There's nary a bit of fat in this lineup, and with the exception of Kota Ibushi (whose presence will be missed on this card), all the company's major stars are accounted for.  So let's get to predictin'!

Tuesday, June 30, 2015

Pro Wrestling: A Mark's History, part 5 (I Like Heels Now)

February 3rd, 1989 - The moment which altered my perception of pro wrestling forever.  It was the second annual Friday night WWF special, The Main Event.  Like the previous year, the WWF used this live primetime broadcast to set the stage for WrestleMania.  This time however it was The MegaPowers vs. The Twin Towers - a match/angle that would be the catalyst for WrestleMania V. 

For months the company had been building to the eventual breakup of Hulk Hogan and Randy Savage, throwing in subtle hints of dissension before eventually staging multiple in-ring arguments.  The Main Event would be the night their partnership would dissolve.

During the bout, Savage was thrown out of the ring and landed on Elizabeth, knocking her to the floor.  Hogan spent the next several minutes seeing to her care and brought her to the dressing room for medical attention (Watching this segment now is positively guffaw-inducing, mostly due to Hogan's ridiculous overacting, but to my 13-year-old eyes at the time it was intense drama.), leaving Savage alone against his two massive opponents.  When Hogan finally returned to the ring, Savage abandoned him after slapping him in the face, much to the shock of the crowd.

So goofy by today's standards, but man this angle was brilliant.

Friday, June 26, 2015

The Wrestling Mid-Year Report

Welcome back to Enuffa.com, and a special Wrestling Mid-Year Report!  Today I'll be taking a look back at the first half of 2015 and examining what worked and what didn't, where the major companies are going, and I'll give my unofficial picks for the best of the year thus far.  Let's get on it.



2015's been a roller coaster for WWE so far; for the second straight year their planned direction for WrestleMania season was met with a mixed-at-best response.  Vince's choice for the next top babyface, Roman Reigns, failed to galvanize the fanbase.  Quite the opposite in fact; when it became evident Reigns would likely be given the ball at WrestleMania, he was met with a harsh backlash to which even The Rock wasn't immune.  After a pretty terrible Royal Rumble show where WWE seemed to completely bury the few babyfaces who were actually over (Daniel Bryan, Dean Ambrose and Dolph Ziggler), it looked like we'd be in for a pretty rotten WrestleMania season, particularly since WWE Champion Brock Lesnar seemed to be on his way out of the company. 

WWE addressed the elephant in the room at February's new PPV FastLane, by having Roman Reigns defend his WrestleMania spot against the fans' top choice, Daniel Bryan.  In what was both a very strong match and a good indicator that Reigns could handle himself in a singles main event, Roman retained his 'Mania spot and was seemingly confirmed as the next big star.  Also at FastLane rising heel Rusev got his first real main event-level match against John Cena, and actually beat WWE's posterboy somewhat decisively. 

Tuesday, June 23, 2015

Dan's Top 9: Fictional Drugs

Ah, Drugs. Can’t beat 'em when it comes to having a night out on the town that lasts for 4 days and ends in St. Louis. But we are getting screwed here in the real world. In the fictional world there are countless drugs out there with incredible powers that can only be brought to you be the very best special effects artists. Here now are the best of the best.


DAN'S TOP

FICTIONAL DRUGS

9. Nuke (Robocop 2):  The only real power this drug has is turning an awesome Sci-Fi action movie into a shitty, muddled mess of crap WITHOUT Kurtwood Smith’s evil Clarence Boddicker character…so pointless.

AWESOME

8. ALZ-112, ALZ-113 (New Planet of the Apes series): Erases Alzheimer’s AND empowers monkeys with smarts & less poo flinging. Which is quite remarkable as the feces toss is paramount to a good time in the primate world. And I, for one, welcome our new Ape overlords.

Friday, June 19, 2015

RIP My Playstation 3: How To Deal With The Loss Of A Loved One

(Editor's Note: Let's all offer our condolences to Dan Moore in his time of heartbreak.  I'm here for ya buddy.....)

Yesterday was a dark day in the Moore household. There I was, minding my own business, and John Marston's business as well; a standard game of Red Dead Redemption on the good ol' PS3, when BEEP...then blank screen. 'The hell? Glitches happen, what can ya do? I calmly (not at all calmly, I was swearing like a sailor with the clap) restarted the system and then I saw it. The light. The yellow light.  The awful, terrible yellow light of death.  I had heard about this horrible light before and was now experiencing its awfulness. It stared deeply into my eyes, taunting me. This was the light that signals a fatal problem with the motherboard, a death sentence for the system. I was devastated. My old friend was dead. 

Beautiful, isn't she?
RIP PS3: Summer 2007-June 18th, 2015

Thursday, June 18, 2015

Game of Thrones Review: Mother's Mercy

Howdy all, Dan Moore here. I'm a huge fan of Game of Thrones, the TV show, so if you're one of those book know-it-alls, BEAT IT. I like when my imagination is shown to me, so screw you.

Well folks, another GoT finale, another kick to the groin for characters we love. It seems every year the creators decide that they've had enough of a fan favorite character and bump that person right off. It's brutal. RIP Myrcella Baratheon. You will be missed.

She was...probably cool.


Thursday, June 11, 2015

WWE Money in the Bank 2015 Predictions!!

Welcome to what has become a biweekly tradition at Enuffa.com, the WWE PPV Predictions column, where my associate Dan Moore and I break down WWE's upcoming "special events."



After a pretty great Elimination Chamber show, WWE has assembled another strong on-paper lineup, and while the build has been uneven as usual, I look forward to several of the bouts.

Justin leads Dan 20/30 to 19/30.  It's a real horse race we've got goin'!


Preshow Match: King Barrett vs. R-Truth


Jeezus, Barrett's in a career free-fall.  I don't understand a) why they can't just push the guy as a dominant midcard bully and b) why having anyone win the King of the Ring tourney ruins that person's life for at least six months.  Anyway, this feud's pretty pointless and these two have wrestled each other about a million times on free television, with Truth usually getting the upset win.

Justin's pick: Christ, give Barrett a win, will ya?
Dan's pick: POINTLESS. How do you make a half assed, on the fly KOTR tourney, pick a guy to win it & then just bury him? I don't get it. The Truth will set you free.



Tag Team Championship: New Day vs. Prime Time Players


I found it odd that PTP was the last team eliminated in the Chamber two weeks ago, being that they just got back together and hadn't really been built up again.  That said, I'm glad Young and O'Neil are a team once again, since they're 2014 split was utterly useless for both guys.  This match should be solid.

Justin's pick: New Day retains
Dan's pick: Yup



Divas Championship: Nikki Bella vs. Paige


The Divas division is still a clustermess, with no clear moral alignment from anyone.  Are the Bellas heels or babyfaces?  Which one is Paige?  None of this shit makes any sense.  Is the entire division stuck in the "shades of gray" Attitude Era?

Justin's pick: Nikki retains, probably until she eclipses AJ Lee's record-breaking Title run.
Dan's pick: I think they'll have Nikki break the record. Just so Mrs. Punk is outta the record books. (BTW, they should really be making a bigger deal of Nikki's streak here, right? Make it sound like a big deal, get some intrigue & suspense into this thing)



Intercontinental Championship: Ryback vs. Big Show


Really?  This is the best challenger you could come up with for Ryback?  You are aware Ryback is taking up Daniel Bryan's old job of restoring the IC Title to prominence and prestige, yes?  Fuck me.....

Justin's pick: Ryback
Dan's pick: Dude, enough with Paul Wight. Goldberg II will win.



John Cena vs. Kevin Owens


After a near show stealing match at EC, these two have the stiff challenge of topping themselves.  I think they can do so now that they'll be more comfortable with each other in the ring.  Owens has been booked superbly, so let's hope WWE doesn't screw this up.

Justin's pick: I'm guessing Cena wins in non-decisive fashion to set up a rubber match.
Dan's pick: Cena by DQ



Money in the Bank Ladder Match: Roman Reigns vs. Randy Orton vs. Dolph Ziggler vs. Sheamus vs. Kofi Kingston vs. Neville vs. Kane


On paper this looks like a fine Ladder Match (though again I'm pretty burned out on this concept and it needs to be a once-a-year-at-most kinda thing.  I'm not sure why Kofi is suddenly being thrust into singles action when he's got a great three-man team going, but I'm sure he'll pull off some spectacular stunts, as will Neville.  What the flyin' hell is Kane doing in this match?  I guess if Kane were to win he could use that as something to hold over Rollins' head, which could be entertaining.  But fuck, man, the guy's almost 50 years old.  He needs to be phased out as an active competitor.

Justin's pick: Roman Reigns is the obvious choice, and Sheamus is the dark horse.  I guess Reigns presents more creative options than Sheamus, so I'll go with Rock's cousin.
Dan's pick: Yeah, the only entrants with a shot are Sheamus and RR. I prefer when a heel has the briefcase so he can score a title shot in nefarious ways, but I think Reigns takes it.



WWE Championship Ladder Match: Seth Rollins vs. Dean Ambrose


These two stole the show at Chamber and I fully expect them to do the same here.  I could watch Ambrose and Rollins pretend to beat each other up all day long.  Unlike the multi-man Ladder Match, I still really enjoy the one-on-one variety, as they can actually tell a story while taking sick bumps.  This should be great.

Justin's pick: Rollins retains and gets his strap back after Ambrose's theft of said item.
Dan's pick: Seth for the win here (though here's what I'd like to see: RR wins the briefcase. Seth & Dean go at it in a vicious brawl, with Ambrose coming out as champion, to be congratulated by his friend Roman...who promptly bashes Ambrose with said case, and pins him for the heel turn and the win. Sets up Reigns v Ambrose for the belt for summer slam, and Brock comes back as a good guy to get revenge on Rollins in the co-main event. BOOM - perfect booking)


That's certainly a popular scenario - a lot of folks are predicting exactly that.  I'd be okay with it, but I dunno how likely a Reigns heel turn is.


There's our MITB picks.  The show looks like another solid piece of bidness from WWE.  Let's hope it lives up to the promise.  See ya next time!

Tuesday, June 9, 2015

Game of Thrones Review: The Dance of Dragons

(Editor's Note: My associate Dan Moore is back to review the latest Game of Thrones episode.  As always the content of this review is Greek to me, being that I've never seen a single episode of this show.  Seriously, I haven't the slightest fucking idea what he's talking about......)


Howdy all, Dan Moore here. I'm a huge fan of Game of Thrones, the TV show, so if you're one of those book know-it-alls, BEAT IT. I like when my imagination is shown to me, so screw you.


This weeks episode was a torture chamber of emotions. Whereas last week's hour put the Night's Watch through a physical ringer, 'The Dance of Dragons' put the viewer through the emotional ringer. A lot happened in many locales this week so I'll break it down by region.


DORNE

Ok, let's recap this story: Jamie, with the help of sell sword Bronn, heads to Dorne to rescue his diece (that's daughter/niece, people) Myrcella from danger. Meanwhile, dead (Goddammit) Prince Oberyn's children, the Sand Snakes, led by their mother Ellaria Sand, decide they have to kidnap Myrcella to start a war with the Lannisters. It all goes to hell, Jamie, Bronn and the Sand Snakes all end up in the clink. One of the girls gets naked, Bronn is poisoned for like eleven seconds, and then The reigning Dornish Prince, Doran, decides to let everyone go. He not only lets Jamie take Myrcella with him, but also her betrothed, his son Prince Trystane to serve on the small council back at King's Landing.

Monday, June 8, 2015

Dumb Action Movie Reviews: Escape Plan

Welcome to another edition of Dumb Action Movie Reviews, wherein I, Dan Moore, traverse the cinematic wonderland that is Netflix, Youtube and various other websites looking for crappy action movies. The ratings are based on 1-4 Indiana Jones whips, as he's the premier action movie character ever and the whip is AWESOME.



NOTE: THERE WILL BE SPOILERS IN THIS REVIEW BECAUSE THERE HAS TO BE. BUT DONT WORRY, THE SPOILERS ARE POINTLESS, JUST LIKE THE PLOT TWISTS IN THE MOVIE.

Tuesday, June 2, 2015

Game of Thrones Review: Hardhome

**Editor's Note: I have never seen a single episode of Game of Thrones, so I'll have to take Dan's word for it that this week's show was the greatest thing since the discovery of the orgasm.  I didn't understand a word of this review Dan, not a fuckin' word......**


Howdy all, Dan Moore here. I'm a huge fan of Game of Thrones, as most people nowadays are. I've also only watched the TV show, so if you're one of those book know-it-alls, BEAT IT. I like when my imagination is shown to me, so screw you.

Anyways, this weeks episode was INSANE. The first 40 minutes were quite good, moving along the various plots of Westeros. Arya continues her training in the House of Black & White. Sansa has learned from the artist formerly known as Theon that her brothers are, in fact, alive. Tyrion has finally had his meeting with the Khaleesi, and these two put on a fine back and forth to see if they can work together to possibly bring peace to the Five Kingdoms.

But FUCK ALL THAT. Ice Zombie War!!! Holy SHIT that was awesome.

Monday, June 1, 2015

Elimination Chamber Is the Best WWE PPV So Far in 2015

What's up gang?  Just wanted to share a few thoughts about the Elimination Chamber PPV we all watched last night. 



First off, I really enjoyed this show.  There wasn't a bad match on the card and the two big singles matches delivered huge.  For a show thrown together in the span of two weeks, WWE did a tremendous job of making it feel important and assembling a strong, entertaining card.

The Tag Chamber was a really fun way to kick things off.  There are few things in wrestling that warm my heart quite like the sight of a full-fledged tag team division.  While not every team on the roster has a direction right now, just the fact that there are enough viable duos to fill a Chamber brings to mind the wonderful tag divisions of the late 80s.  Five of the six teams got at least a few moments to shine (Los Matadores kinda got the shaft, but El Torito got some highspots in), and The Ascension looked better than they ever have.  Cesaro/Kidd of course did the lion's share of the work to hold the match together, and I was a little disappointed they weren't in the final segment with The New Day.  But make no mistake, this was enjoyable from start to finish while also making the Tag Titles seem important.  The New Day continues to be one of the best acts on the show these days.  What a difference two months has made for them.

Friday, May 29, 2015

WWE Elimination Chamber 2015 Predictions!!!

Aaaand welcome back to Enuffa.com for yet another round of WWE PPV Predictions!


The Chamber is back!  Despite most arenas now boasting electronic scoreboards that make hanging the heavy, demonic structure from the ceiling impossible, WWE found one arena in Corpus Christi that hasn't yet made such upgrades.  Thus WWE is bringing back the Elimination Chamber for this Network "Special Event."

The show was hastily thrown together over the past two weeks but I'll be goddamned if this isn't the strongest on-paper lineup thus far in WWE's 2015 calendar.  Two Chamber matches for secondary Titles, an awesome WWE Title match, and the main roster in-ring debut of the current NXT Champ, against WWE's posterboy no less.  I'm actually very excited about this show, and I hope it delivers on all fronts.

Could WWE Revive the Territory System?

Welcome to a special discussion thread here at Enuffa.com.  My friends Travis and Jim each came up with scenarios whereby WWE could revive the territory system of old, but all under the WWE brand, in a way that would diversify the product and create a robust farm system for rising talent.  Without further ado, here's what they came up with.....


Travis: Watching the NXT crowd in Florida tells me that the possibility of regional territories remains surprisingly viable, in principle. I wonder if instead of taking a singular NXT brand on the road, Triple H has considered creating, say, up to half a dozen different shows like NXT, each with its own roster and local championships, with one traveling NXT World Champion, too. They could all air weekly shows on the Network, on different days and maybe even at different times, each with a different flavor. Pick cities like Chicago, Philadelphia, Los Angeles, New York, Boston, Corpus Christi or Dallas, Montreal or Toronto, Atlanta or Charlotte, or wherever they have the most distinctive and reliable fan bases. Have them all be feeders for Raw and SmackDown, like the territories fed the WWF – but this time in a symbiotic rather than suicidal way.

Thursday, May 21, 2015

Movie Review: Fury Road, or Why I Love Mad Max

What is it about the Mad Max series that has resonated with me (and many others) for the past thirty years?  Why has its central character endured as an iconic dystopian anti-hero?  Why does this series of films with such barebones storylines and almost monosyllabic characters still inspire such fascination?

I've just seen the latest installment/rebirth, Mad Max: Fury Road, starring Tom Hardy in the titular role made famous by Mel Gibson, and it's left my brain swirling with so many varied thoughts and impressions.  Fury Road is one of the most unrelenting action vehicles (no pun intended?) I've ever seen.  Much like its predecessor The Road Warrior, it has the most basic of plots and tells almost the entire story through dazzling, kinetic action sequences.  Its hero has probably less total dialogue over two hours than one Joe Pesci scene in Goodfellas, and his purpose in the film is to assist Imperator Furiosa (Charlize Theron) in liberating five young women from the despotic Immortan Joe (Hugh Keys-Byrne, who was also The Toecutter in the original Mad Max), a cult leader who has kept them imprisoned as baby factories in his mountainous fortress called The Citadel.  Once Joe discovers his "wives" are missing, he sends his army of War Boys after them, and the extended action sequences take it from there.


Tuesday, May 19, 2015

Beer Brawl: Night Shift Brewing vs. Idle Hands Craft Ales

Welcome to a special beer-related column here at Enuffa.com!  Today I'll be comparing and contrasting two local Massachusetts breweries my wife Kelly and I visited over the weekend - Night Shift Brewing and Idle Hands Craft Ales, both located in Everett, MA.  Both companies have been making beer for about three years, but have taken very different approaches. 

Visiting these two breweries back-to-back strangely brought to mind the 2006 Christopher Nolan film, The Prestige.  If you aren't familiar, The Prestige starred Hugh Jackman and Christian Bale as rival magicians in Victorian England.  Jackman's character (Robert Angier) is a consummate showman who knows how to work a crowd and present his act in the most entertaining way possible, while Bale (Alfred Borden) is more of an introvert and student of the prestidigitation game, obsessed with creating groundbreaking illusions but initially unskilled at dressing up his act to garner the best audience reaction.  Remember that comparison for later....


Thursday, May 14, 2015

WWE Payback 2015 Predictions!!!

Jeez, it's already time for another WWE PPV?  Feels like we just had one three weeks ago.  Oh wait.....  And evidently we'll have ANOTHER of these "special events" in two weeks when Elimination Chamber returns.  Both of these events are free this month on WWE Network, cuz Vinny Mac wants to hook ya!


Anyway, Payback looks like a solid if unimportant show.  As of now only six PPV matches and a preshow match have been announced.  I'd love it if they'd keep the lineup to just those six matches.  Big fan of streamlined cards without clutter.  But I'm sure they'll add The Bellas vs. Naomi & Tamina.
***For the 2015 season, Justin leads Dan 11/16 to 10/16.***

Tuesday, May 12, 2015

DeflateGate, or How The NFL Learned to Stop Worrying and Love the Mob (Mentality)

(Editor's Note: The following statements are the opinion of Enuffa Contributor Dan Moore and do not necessarily reflect the views of Enuffa.com or its management.............ah, who am I kiddin', he's 100% correct.)

   
FULL DISCLAIMER: I am from South Boston, Massachusetts. The Bay State. The home of revolutions and tea parties. I am an unabashed Boston sports fan. I love the Sox, Celts, B’s and of course the Pats. I’ll try to be unbiased in this piece but that’s almost impossible as we’re living in bizzaro world with this particular subject so my opinion is a tad skewed. You’ve been warned. Also, I’m gonna swear. A lot.
   
The NFL has laid down Thor’s fucking hammer on the most successful franchise of this millennium. In the last 15 years, The New England Patriots have won the AFC East 11 times, been to 9 AFC championship games, 6 Super Bowls and have won the big game 4 times, including this year. They are, without a doubt, the cream of the crop of the biggest sports entity in the world. They are also being dragged through the mud by that same sports entity.