WWE WrestleMania 42 was yet another demonstration of this company's utter contempt for their audience when it comes to actually giving them their money's worth. At a time when WWE tickets cost exorbitantly more than they ever have, the people running WWE seem to care the least about providing adequate value. 'Mania ran a total of seven and a half hours over two nights. The actual wrestling content totaled two hours and forty-five minutes. Just over one third of the total running time. The rest consisted of ads, ads, overlong entrances, ads, "host" segments, ads, and more fucking ads. On a streaming service that costs $30 a month. This is shrinkflation in action. Just for a quick comparison, WrestleMania X ran two hours and forty-three minutes and yet had ten more in-ring minutes than either night of this year's show. That's frankly embarrassing.
And look, Night 2 this year was actually quite a good show. Had it been an old-school three-hour format, Night 2 could be considered a top ten WrestleMania card. From an in-ring standpoint it was pretty high up there. But it was also marred by all the obscene time-wasting, about which WWE has amazingly become even worse since Vince exited the company. I need WWE loyalists to explain why this arrangement is acceptable to them. As someone who's not emotionally invested in this product at all anymore, whatever, I can just watch the show late and skip all the bullshit. But for you folks who love this stuff and watch it live, why would you ever be okay with a 43-minute (that's FORTY-THREE) gap between the end of Match 6 and the start of Match 7, on a show you're paying to see? Demand more of a product you're spending all this money on, for the love of fuck. Have some dignity.
I said Night 2 was a very good show. Night 1 was.....not a very good show. Night 1 had roughly the same amount of actual wrestling as Night 2, but ran a half-hour longer, and most of the matches felt so rushed they were completely nondescript. Only three bouts got longer than ten minutes, and the main event, while mechanically well-worked, was booked so nonsensically all of its positive aspects were totally negated. We thought last year's Cody-Cena finish made no sense, boy did Cody-Orton do its best to top it.
But first let's talk about the undercard.
The opening bout began sixteen goddamn minutes into the show and was only given seven. LA Knight and The Usos faced Logan Paul, Austin Theory and IShowSpeed, who was a reluctant partner to the Vision guys and did very little in the actual match. The six of them went back and forth for a few minutes and then ISS accidentally shoved LA Knight into Logan, knocking him off the apron and drawing his wrath. Paul yelled at ISS, but Knight shoved Austin Theory into ISS and then hit ISS with the BFT for the win. Paul was outraged and attacked ISS, setting him up for an announce table spot. But the babyfaces interrupted and set up Paul on the table instead, allowing ISS to hit a top rope splash for the social media clicks. The best part of this match happened afterward. Other than that it was completely forgettable. **
Next was one of the better bouts, as Drew McIntyre faced Jacob Fatu in an "unsanctioned" match that was just your standard WWE Street Fight, with chairs, tables, kendo sticks, a toolbox, and no blood. This got fourteen minutes and both guys worked hard. They hit each other with some big movies and Drew used a wrench on Fatu, making it look like we'd see some crimson, but nothing. That was odd. Drew hit a Claymore for a nearfall but Fatu came back and set up a table spot. Drew threw a chair at his head and knocked him through the table instead. Fatu came back again and hit a few superkicks and a Best Moonsault Ever for the win. This was solid but in no way did the level of violence match the Unsanctioned gimmick. ***3/4
Another forgettable match was next as the Women's Tag belts were decided in a four-way. The one noteworthy thing here was the return of Paige, subbing for an injured Nikki Bella. Which of course telegraphed the result. They got about eight minutes and did a bunch of stuff, then it boiled down to Paige and Charlotte. Charlotte went for the Figure Four but Paige rolled her up for a nearfall. Charlotte hit Natural Selection to set up Alexa for Twisted Bliss, but then Alexa was distracted by Nikki pulling Charlotte out of the ring and whacking her with her crutch. Nothing like a dumb distraction spot. Alexa dove on Paige but Paige got her knees up and hit RamPaige for the win. Not much to this. **
Another women's match followed, and also got shortchanged for time. AJ Lee vs. Becky Lynch for the Women's I-C Title looked decent on paper but was another rushed match with people doing "stuff." The most memorable moments here involved Becky and referee Jessika Carr, which I guess is setting up a future match? Becky stripped one of the turnbuckle pads and Carr yelled at her and half-assedly put it back on. But later AJ charged at Becky, who pulled Carr in front of her, and the distraction let Becky ram AJ into the exposed buckle. One Man-Handle Slam later and Becky is the new I-C Champ. Another RAW-level match. **1/4
FINALLY things picked up in the fifth bout, as Seth Rollins and Gunther had a really good 15-minute match. Michael Cole said one of the stupidest things ever "If you went into this expecting a five-star wrestling match, you're not going to get it. This is a fight." Uhh, who wants to tell him brawls can earn five-star ratings too? Gunther attacked Seth before the bell and they brawled at ringside for a couple minutes before the bell officially rang. They fought back and forth and finally hit their big moves on each other. Seth escaped the sleeper and eventually locked in one of his own. They fought to the outside and Seth hit a few suicide dives, but Gunther countered the last one and powerbombed Seth into the apron and the edge of the announce table. Seth countered a table powerbomb into a Pedigree on the table. Suddenly Bron Breakker ran down and speared Seth on the outside, and by the time both guys were back in the ring Gunther was able to lock in another sleeper for the pass-out win. Post-match Bron ran back down the ramp for another spear on Seth. Lame finish but the match was quite good up until then. Easily the best thing on this show. ****1/4
The most criminally shortchanged bout of Night 1 was the Women's World Title match. Stephanie Vaquer and Liv Morgan were on their way to a pretty good showing, but once again they were rushed to finish everything in under seven minutes (so we could have more time for fucking commercials). They went back and forth for a while until Raquel Rodriguez and Roxanne Perez ran down for distractions. Vaquer took them both out but Liv used the distraction to hit a Codebreaker and Oblivion to win the belt. Can this company not come up with any other way for heels to win titles than by interference that makes the babyface look dumb? **1/2
After forty-three minutes (again, that's FOUR-THREE minutes) of ads, video packages, a John Cena-Bianca Belair segment where Bianca revealed she's pregnant, interminable entrances, and a pre-match attack by Pat McAfee, we finally kicked off the main event of Cody Rhodes vs. Randy Orton.
McAfee did Orton's introduction and then hit Cody with the microphone, Cody fought back, tossed Orton into the ring post, and then hit McAfee with CrossRhodes. He then set McAfee up on the announce table so Jelly Roll could splash him through it. Then we had to sit through Pat being stretchered out before the actual match started.
The booking of this match as I said before was baffling. Cody dominated the first third of it by basically working as a heel, while Orton played the babyface in peril after suffering a back injury. The crowd gave less than a shit about this match when Cody was in control and only perked up when Orton took over. Cody also bloodied Orton by ramming him into the ring post, which only further made Orton look sympathetic. Once they started trading big moves and nearfalls this match actually got very good for a while. But then Cody poked Orton in the eye, and Orton blindly hit the referee with an RKO by mistake, before hitting Cody with one on purpose. Pat McAfee then ran down in a referee shirt, as though that's legally binding, and then SLOW-COUNTED HIS OWN GUY'S PIN ATTEMPT. Cody kicked out at two, Orton smiled up at Pat, then stood up and hit Pat with an RKO. Cody took advantage of the distraction to hit a CrossRhodes and score the pin counted by the real referee. Post-match Orton hit Cody with an RKO before punting him in the head (Cody started bleeding during the match and the punt apparently hit him in the eye).
So to recap, the babyface champion worked the match as a heel, the heel challenger worked the match as a babyface, the heel's de facto manager ran down in a ref shirt to slow-count his guy's pin, the heel challenger took out his manager to a chorus of cheers, the babyface champion hit his finisher off the distraction to win the match, and the heel challenger who seemingly just turned babyface, turned heel again with a post-match attack. What the fuck story was this match supposed to be telling? Who are we meant to be rooting for? None of this made any sense, and it just further cements the fact that WWE can't book a babyface champion to save their lives, and Cody needs to turn heel at this point because they've ruined whatever babyface charisma he had. I guess because the two wrestlers worked hard I'll give this ***1/2 but thanks to the booking it really doesn't deserve that high a rating. Whichever "producer" put this shit together should get canned.
Sooo, another Night 1 of a two-night show that was largely pointless and had almost no actual wrestling on it compared with the non-wrestling content. Thank Christ Night 2 delivered overall because this was heading toward Bottom 10 WrestleManias territory.
Best Match: Seth Rollins vs. Gunther
Worst Match: Women's 4-way
What I'd Change: Get. Rid. Of. The. Fucking. Commercials. Any show you have to pay money to see should not have ads in it, period. WWE has enough clout to negotiate an ad-free show on behalf of their audience. But they won't, because they only care about their profits. This company is borderline abusive toward its viewers.
Most Disappointing Match: Cody vs. Orton could've been a great main event in the hands of a competent booking team.
Most Pleasant Surprise: Nothing really. What little good stuff existed on this show I expected to like.
Overall Rating: 5/10
Alright, now for Night 2. Aside from another evening of obscene advertising content, abbreviated undercard matches, the removal of a match that could've stolen the whole show, and another instance of grotesque time-wasting before the main event, it was hard to believe this was put on by the same company. Three of the six matches were far too short, but even those were at least effective, and the two longest matches delivered huge. As for the main event, I was never so glad to be wrong.
This show opened with Brock Lesnar vs. Oba Femi, and as expected it was very brief. I'm honestly flabbergasted Brock has ever been satisfied working all these sub-ten-minute matches that all play out the same way. Doesn't he ever get bored doing the same shit every time? Anyway, Brock and Oba had a power struggle and Brock tried to overpower his gigantic opponent but to no avail, Femi was ready and knocked Brock down instead. Brock rammed Oba into the ring steps and hit three German suplexes, but Oba withstood them and came right back. Brock hit an F5 but Oba shook off the effects and stood up. Oba hit a chokeslam and sitout powerbomb to win the match, and the place went apeshit. Push this guy to the moon. Brock sat in the ring alone, crying, and took off his gloves and boots, teasing retirement. Hearing the crowd chant "Thank you Brock" is pretty gross, considering what we now know about him. This should've been about twice as long but it accomplished what it needed to and the right guy won. So I'll be generous. ***
The second match, which nearly stole the weekend, was the Intercontinental Ladder Match pitting Penta against Rey Mysterio, Je'Von Evans, Dragon Lee, Rusev and JD McDonagh. This wasn't on the level of an AEW ladder match and didn't get as much time, but it was a crazy match that featured a bunch of wild high spots. Je'Von did some insane dives and came off like a huge deal, which was refreshing. McDonagh hit Dragon Lee with a Spanish Fly off a ladder, Penta hit McDonagh with a Canadian Destroyer onto a ladder bridge, Evans hit a cutter on Rusev from the top rope to a ladder, and finally Penta hit Je'Von with a Destroyer in the ring before climbing up and retrieving his title. Really good match. ****1/4
Next up were two consecutive rushed matches, starting with Sami Zayn vs. Trick Williams for the US Title. Like the Steph-Liv match the night before, this was on its way to being really good but only got seven minutes and thus fell short. Zayn worked a heel style and was very aggressive from the start. Late in the match Williams' friend Lil Yachty interfered but Zayn momentarily overcame the distraction. They traded finisher attempts but Williams hit his Trick Shot to win the title. The crowd loved that. **3/4
Another Street Fight was next and while it got ten minutes, it was still too short to really be memorable. Still Finn Balor and Dom Mysterio worked hard. They used the usual plunder, tables, chairs, and kendo sticks. Dom hit a 619 with a chair wrapped around Finn's head, then got a nearfall after a Frog Splash. Balor came back and wrapped the chair around Dom's head and hit two corner dropkicks, followed by a Coup de Grace through a table to win. This was fine but should've been five minutes longer. ***1/4
The one short match on this show that really felt the right length was the WWE Women's Title match, as Jade Cargill defended against Rhea Ripley. This went ten minutes and proved to be Jade's best WWE match to date by far. Usually when watching a Cargill match you can see that she's memorized sequences of moves and you can kinda see the wheels turning as she recites them. But this one actually flowed like a real match and I'm not sure if Jade's finally turned a corner or if Rhea's just that good at leading. Either way, this was a solid piece of work by both. Cargill's friends Michin and B-Fab interfered late, allowing Cargill to hit a One Winged Angel (blasphemy!) on Rhea for a two-count. The referee was about to eject Michin and B-Fab but IYO Sky ran down to take them out. Yes, IYO Sky, the best wrestler in the entire company, whose match was cut from this show due to "time constraints," was reduced to a late-match walk-on. Fucking unacceptable. Rhea attempted a Riptide but Jade escaped and hit a big boot, then went for Jaded, but Rhea escaped and finally hit a Riptide to win the title back. Very good match. ***1/2
We were then treated to another insanely long block of dead air. From the end of Rhea-Jade to the start of Punk-Roman totaled 39, THIRTY-NINE minutes. Now for a little math: the two long gaps before each night's main events totaled eight-two, that's EIGHT-TWO minutes, roughly equaling the amount of total wrestling on either night. I'll ask again WWE fans, WHY ARE YOU SATISFIED WITH THIS?
John Cena came down again to announce the attendance, was interrupted by The Miz, and then Danhausen came down to curse Miz. Then we got a long-ass video package and two long-ass ring entrances for Punk and Roman. Oh, and did I mention the fucking ads?
Finally after enough time to watch two episodes of a sitcom (if you skip the opening credits), the main event began. And like I said, boy was I happy to be wrong about this one. Punk vs. Roman was a fantastic WrestleMania main event. Thirty-four minutes, no run-ins, no hamfisted attempts at "cinema." Just a great, old-fashioned wrestling match. They paced the match basically perfectly, Punk actually got into good cardio shape and his wrestling looked the most crisp it has in years. They built up to all their big moves and stole each other's finishers, but kept kicking out of everything. Punk locked in the Anaconda Vice but Roman countered with a guillotine that nearly ended the match. Punk rolled him up for a nearfall and they reset. They traded strikes and Punk tore off his wrist tape, crumpled it up and threw it at Roman. The referee picked up the tape and tossed it outside, allowing Punk to hit a low blow followed by a GTS for a nearfall. Punk set Roman up on the announce table and hit a Macho Man elbow off the top, then back in the ring he hit another GTS, and they yet again recycled the Punk-Moxley All Out spot, where the opponent bounces off the ropes and falls on Punk's shoulders. But this time Punk didn't have the strength to hit the move again, and just collapsed. This allowed Roman to hit a spear, Punk struggled to his feet, and Roman hit a double-rope-bounce spear to win the match. Honestly, as I was watching this I was thinking "Where the hell have these two guys been??" This might've been Roman's best singles match ever, and was certainly Punk's best match since returning to wrestling five years ago. I'm not a fan of either guy, but goddamn did they both bring their A-games for this. This is a top-ten WrestleMania main event (Time to update my rankings). It won't hold up to AEW's best stuff this year but I'll be surprised if another WWE match in 2026 tops it. Incidentally Roman Reigns is now the holder of the secondary World Title belt, which only exists because he wasn't around enough to defend the primary World Title belt. Irony is dead. ****3/4
Side note: Incapable of leaving any accomplishment untarnished, Phil Brooks had another douchebag moment in public later that night. TMZ posted video of a fan taking a photo of AJ Lee and Bayley hugging in their hotel lobby, and suddenly Punk walks over, slaps the phone out of the guy's hand, and gets in his face. The fan walks away saying "I'm sorry dude..." and Punk responds with "No you're not," before storming away with AJ. Like, I get that you're off the clock, but after two-plus decades in public life you'd think Phil could muster up the decorum to calmly walk over and say "Dude, please don't take pics right now, this isn't the time." But no, let's slap the guy's phone out of his hand like a schoolyard bully. Maybe Phil was triggered because the iPhone screen is made with REAL GLASS! He must be just fucking unbearable to live with, man. Your dog ain't dead Phil, he's hidin'.
Anyway, this show was of course not without some major gripes - three matches got shortchanged, one was removed entirely for absolutely no reason, thus the best wrestler in the company got one minute of screen time, and the audience was assaulted with commercials, but WrestleMania 42, Night 2 delivered where it needed to, including one of their best-ever 'Mania main events. Light years better than Night 1.
Best Match: Punk vs. Roman
Worst Match: Sami vs. Trick, which was still okay.
What I'd Change: As I said, get rid of the fucking dead air, include IYO vs. Asuka on the show and give it 12-13 minutes, and add time to Brock-Femi, Sami-Trick and Finn-Dom.
Most Disappointing Match: Sami vs. Trick
Most Pleasant Surprise: The main event - I really didn't think either of those guys had a match like that in them anymore, and we may never see it again.
Overall Rating: 8/10
So yeah, another year, another mixed bag of a WrestleMania. I'm not sure the two-night format really works for me. There's simply too much filler and I think I actually preferred a single 5-hour show to a two-night 7.5-hour show. Regardless, there is simply no excuse for the wrestling taking up less than half a wrestling PPV's running time. AEW manages a 2:1 ratio or better, every PPV. WWE fans need to demand more for their dollar.
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