WWE's already got another PPV this weekend, only three weeks after the abnormally late WrestleMania. And boy does this show look skippable. This five-match B-show thing is quite lame considering how much time they waste with video packages and entrances. Mania could've easily fit 1-2 more matches per night without extending the overall running time, and so can these B-shows.
Also, not one black wrestler on this card, not one. Never. Beating. The allegations. Sorry.
Intercontinental Championship: Dominik Mysterio vs. Penta
This is one of three potentially good matches on the show. Dominik is always either a heat magnet, or in the case of 'Mania, one of the most popular guys on the card. Penta is always fun to watch. I don't see any title change happening this soon though.
Pick: Dominik retains
US Championship: Jacob Fatu vs. Drew McIntyre vs. Damian Priest vs. LA Knight
Another match that should be fun. Jacob and Drew are consistently good in the ring, Damian can be good when motivated, and Knight is fine if he's in there with good workers. Again, the current champion just won this title three weeks ago so he ain't losing yet.
Pick: Jacob retains
Women's Intercontinental Championship: Lyra Valkyria vs. Becky Lynch
WWE has booked these secondary women's titles all wrong. Generally if you're introducing a new title you either want the inaugural champ to be someone with some credibility to then give the title some credibility, or you want to make a new star with the title by having them keep it for a long time. In the case of both new women's belts, neither of those things happened, as Chelsea Green already lost the US Title to Zelina Vega of all people, and Lyra is likely losing the belt to Becky. Lynch just turned heel again (which hasn't worked for her yet so I don't know why they keep letting her go to this well), so they're not having her lose now. Hopefully Becky can make this belt mean something at least, especially if she has a big feud with Bayley over it.
Pick: Becky
Gunther vs. Pat McAfee
What the actual fuck is this? No room for Bianca, Jade, Carmelo, or either set of tag champs, but we have a fucking announcer (and a bad one at that) wrestling the former World Champion. First off, Pat's a douchebag. Second, Pat's insufferable to listen to on the headset. Third, Pat's not particularly good in the ring. This match is Vince-type garbage. "Booker of the Year" my ass.
Pick: Gunther
WWE Championship: John Cena vs. Randy Orton
Speaking of Vince-like booking, is WWE seriously running back this vastly overrated feud from 16 years ago, in 2025? These two had a pretty good series of matches in 2009, a couple borderline stinkers in 2013-2014, and now with Cena barely able to do his basic stuff and coming off one of the weakest WrestleMania main events of all time, we're expected to give a shit about this? Fuckin' hell, Paul. This is reminiscent of the awful Undertaker-Kane feud of 2010, when both guys were in their mid-forties and their matches were nowhere near the level of their earlier rivalry. Sometimes it's not necessary to run back a big match one last time if the two participants aren't up to doing the feud justice.
Pick: Cena's not losing the belt before SummerSlam
So the three undercard matches have potential to be pretty good. The top two matches do not. RAW's US viewership on Netflix is perilously close to dropping below a million and out of the top ten, but I'm sure the WWE faithful will never ask "Why no millie?" or question why they're headlining PPVs in 2025 with tourist announcers and feuds from the first Obama administration. What phoned-in drivel.
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