WWE Payback 2023 Preview & Predictions

Busy weekend this Labor Day with back-to-back PPVs Saturday and Sunday night.  And oddly both shows are kind of lacking in star power while also looking on paper like a series of good matches.  

The first one is WWE Payback, traditionally one of the company's lesser shows.  And true to said tradition, this show feels like a low B-PPV lineup.  Still I'm interested in seeing a few of these bouts, particularly the World Title match.  Plus the two women's matches are holdovers from the intended SummerSlam card.  Oh and there's a Grayson Waller talk show segment featuring Cody Rhodes, because that sorta thing belongs on a paid event.  But let's get into it....

LA Knight vs. The Miz

This is not one of the more intriguing matches for me.  The Miz is beyond damaged goods at this point, a buffoon not to be taken seriously as a threat to anyone, while I simply don't get the LA Knight obsession, the same way I didn't get why everyone loved Zack Ryder 12 years ago.  Like, he's fine.  He's a reasonably entertaining act, I just don't see him as a top guy at all.  But this match should be alright, they're both perfectly capable in the ring and good at character work.

Pick: LA Knight is obviously winning

US Championship: Rey Mysterio vs. Austin Theory

Here's a rematch from a few weeks back, when Rey Mysterio was allowed a title shot to replace Santos Escobar who had won a tournament over Mysterio for said title shot.  To be fair I guess Rey was legit injured in that tourney final and was probably supposed to win it.  Anyway, not much interest from me in this match either, it should be fine.  My first instinct says Theory regains the title here, as that Mysterio win felt like just a quick feelgood moment.

Pick: Theory  

Top Ten Things: Avatar Songs

Welcome to another Top Ten Things, here at Enuffa.com, where I rank stuff in some kind of order, fully aware that my opinion really has no effect on the universe as we know it.  Today, in honor of having just had my face melted off by this band in concert (for the second time), I'm counting down my favorite tunes by Swedish metal band Avatar!

If you've never checked out this vastly entertaining quintet (and you should), their music ranges from melodic death metal to groove metal to orchestral to AC/DC-influenced blues-rock, but it's all done with a darkly caustic sense of humor.  From a technical standpoint the band is tight as a pair of spandex leggings, and they're led by one of the most captivating, sardonically entertaining frontmen to come down the pike in a long time.  Johannes Eckerstrom is positively magnetic on stage, sporting circus ringmaster garb and Norwegian Black Metal-style corpsepaint, his between-songs banter a morbidly comic nod to such figures as The Joker and Marilyn Manson.  Eckerstrom's maniacal antics drive the stage show, while his four bandmates hurl basketball-size gobs of molten heavy metal at the delighted crowds.  "Would you all bleed for me," he asks?  "YEESSS!" the audience eagerly shouts.  "Oh, don't do that, that's sick..." he replies.  If you like your music heavy, hooky and with a tinge of biting, razor-sharp sarcasm, don't miss a chance to check out Avatar's live show.  This band will kick your ass and have you laughing at the same time.

But I digress, we're talking about their best songs.  Avatar started out as a traditional death metal band, albeit with melodic guitar riffs and harmonies, but have evolved to include numerous eclectic musical elements and styles, including Eckerstrom tempering his strident death metal howl with melodic, power metal-inspired singing.  Their detuned guitars will put a rumble in your belly, the thundering drum and bass-driven grooves will get your head bouncing, and the vocal hooks will get stuck in your head for days.  Avatar is heavy metal for people who like to have fun listening to heavy metal.

On to the Top 10 list, but first a few honorable mentions....


HM: In Napalm

The nihilistic fourth track on Black Waltz has one of the album's best chorus hooks, featuring one of its most demented lyrics, "Let me cleanse my soul in napalm."  Pretty effed up thing to say if you ask me...


HM: Tower

The somber closing track from Hail the Apocalypse, "Tower" initially takes on the tone of a comforting lullaby, but the lyrics gradually reveal the speaker's true intention, love by imprisonment.  One of their most mellow, subtly sinister tunes.


HM: A Statue of the King

The driving first single from their latest album, "A Statue of the King" is a sly, tongue-in-cheek bit of blind cultism, as the lyrics weave phallic symbolism in describing the erection of a statue to the fictional(?) ruler, with phrases like "bigger than the best one" and "they lack proper stone and rocks and balls."


HM: The King Welcomes You to Avatar Country

One of the most memorable tracks from Avatar Country is this AC/DC-esque blues rocker, an invitation to prospective new worshipers of the titular king, with Brian Johnson-style vocals and a sardonic tone.  "Lay down, embracing the earth, this is your final rebirth."

Awesomely Shitty Movies: Robocop 2

Welcome to another edition of Awesomely Shitty Movies, where I take a closer look at a movie that's either a guilty pleasure, an overpraised mound of tripe, or just a disappointment.  Today's entry is the latter.  That's right, it's one of the biggest letdowns in movie sequel history, Robocop 2!

In 1987 director Paul Verhoeven and writers Ed Neumeier and Michael Miner unveiled a near-perfect masterpiece of sci-fi/action/dark comedy/political satire with the original Robocop.  Part takedown of unchecked capitalism, part Christ allegory, part superhero romp, part ultraviolent gorefest, Robocop amazingly managed to juggle all these different tonal elements and weave them into a tightly written, multi-layered thrill ride that could be appreciated on varied levels.  Robocop has to be one of the smartest-written popcorn movies of all time; a brilliant marriage of deft scripting, superb direction and gut-wrenchingly amazing makeup effects (courtesy of past-master Rob Bottin).  I could go on for pages about how goddamn awesome that movie is, but that's not why I'm here.

The 1990 sequel on the other hand, while not a total miss, nonetheless fails to live up to its predecessor on basically every front.  There was a lot of potential here, with a script from comic book genius Frank Miller and direction by Irvin Kershner, who a decade prior had helmed one of the greatest sequels ever.  How could they possibly go wrong?  Well, they found a way.  They found a lotta ways.  Robocop 2 has some things going for it, but it's also got a metric fuckton of issues.

Let's take a look, shall we?



The Awesome


Peter Weller

I'm not sure any other actor can ever play this role.  It certainly hasn't worked yet with anyone else (Robert John Burke and Joel Kinnaman, I'm looking in your general direction).  Weller was born to play the tragic figure of this martyred officer-turned-cyborg.  His understated, taciturn demeanor and everyman heroism make him perfect for this conflicted character.  Sadly the script here doesn't give him nearly as much to do as in the first film; in the first act he's still struggling to let go of his previous life (something that was seemingly resolved in the first movie), in the second act he's barely present at all, and in the third he's relegated to pretty mindless action movie antics.

The Adventures of Buckaroo BadAss.  No?

Same Tone

Robocop 2 brings back the satirical tone of the first movie, complete with over-the-top violence that is both disturbing and darkly comic, plus those wonderfully droll newscast/TV commercial interludes.  Two of the best moments in the entire film are when a couple of the "Robocop 2" prototypes immediately commit suicide; it's both grisly and hilarious, like so many moments in the first movie. There's also the political backdrop of OCP plotting to essentially buy out control of Detroit so they can tear the entire thing down and finally build Delta City.  This all fits in well with what Neumeier, Miner and Verhoeven established in the original.

This stuff is hy-larious.

AEW All In 2023 Preview & Predictions

Alright who's excited??  This Sunday is the long-awaited AEW All In PPV spectacular, the biggest show in company history, in front of one of the biggest crowds in wrestling history (It remains to be seen whether it's the largest paid wrestling audience or not, we'll have to wait to get the official number)!

Contrary to the veritable army of social media whiners, I'm actually very excited for this lineup, as I'm not the type of person who fantasy-books a show and then gets disappointed when said fantasy card doesn't come to fruition.  Newsflash: CM Punk vs. Kenny Omega was never going to happen on this show, nor was The Elite vs. CMFTR.  Anyone who built either of those bouts up in their head as a real possibility at this juncture wasn't being honest with themselves.  What we have instead is a huge AEW Title match involving the biggest angle in the company, a massive rubber match between the two best tag teams in the world (I can't believe people are griping about this one after pissing and moaning that it didn't happen a year ago), a huge dream match originally slated for the 2021 Tokyo Dome show, an absolute banger of a trios match with The Golden Elite, the return of Stadium Stampede, and much more.  As with most AEW PPV lineups, if you can't find *something* here to enjoy, the problem is you.

Anyway let's get into it....

Zero Hour ROH Tag Team Championship: Aussie Open vs. MJF & Adam Cole

This is a weird addition to the lineup but if the MJF-Cole story is going where I think it's going, it makes sense.  So here's where I think it's going (and it felt like AEW kinda tipped their hand last night with Renee showing all the clips of Cole acting shady and Cole storming off): Adam Cole came up short in the AEW Title Eliminator match back in June, MJF wouldn't give him another chance, they ended up tag team partners in the Blind Eliminator tournament, and it was at that point Adam Cole began manipulating MJF into eventually giving him a title match.  In classic parasitic form, Cole preyed on MJF's loneliness and insecurity, getting him to turn over a new leaf and trust again, and it was all designed to maneuver himself into a match for the Triple B.  And Cole's suggestion that they go after the ROH Tag belts together seems to be a way to wear MJF out ahead of the main event.  Cole will spend most of this match on the apron while MJF does the lion's share of the work.  Aussie Open will retain and MJF will come out of this match tired or kayfabe injured.  

Pick: Aussie Open retain

Zero Hour FTW Championship: Jack Perry vs. Hook

I figured once Perry vs. Rob Van Dam took place on free TV that Hook would ultimately show up and challenge Perry to a rematch at All In.  I was actually kinda hoping Perry would retire the belt as it doesn't actually mean anything, but this match should be good anyway.  Hook almost certainly regains the title so Jack can go after a real one.  The International Title seems a good choice for Mr. Perry, plus Jack vs. Orange would be stunning.

Pick: Hook

AEW Trios Championship: House of Black vs. The Acclaimed & Bad Ass Billy Gunn

It's the return of 90s Billy Gunn, whatever that means.  Last night on Dynamite Billy ran in to help Max and Anthony against the Trios Champs and said fun-loving Daddy Ass won't make it to Wembley but Bad Ass Billy Gunn will.  So long as The One Billy Gunn is nowhere to be found....  Anyway this rematch has been building for a while and should be a lot of fun.  I'd have kept these titles on House of Black for a while longer but this seems to be the logical spot for a title change.

Pick: The Acclaimed and Mr. Ass

WWE SummerSlam 2023: Never Get Your Hopes Up

Well, WWE has done it again.  And by "it" I mean snatched a pretty good show from the jaws of instant classic territory.

SummerSlam 2023 was yet another example of a show that should've been in contention for PPV of the Year (or at least WWE PPV of the Year), and was instead just a good solid PPV.  Between a live crowd that was oddly pretty subdued all night and some messy moments and their usual questionable booking decisions, this show overall fell short of my expectations.

Things started out very promisingly as Logan Paul and Ricochet had a very entertaining spotfest-type match that suffered a bit from WWE not being all that good at spotfest-type matches.  For a bout that was intended to "go viral" as an aerial spectacle this wasn't nearly as noteworthy as numerous other examples this year.  But it was very well-worked aside from a couple messy bits, and this was Ricochet's first main roster match with this high a profile.  After plenty of back-and-forth action and nearfalls, one of Paul's friends (who went unnamed) handed him brass knux, which Paul used to knock out Ric and steal a win.  Michael Cole's line "This was a great match but the ending sucked" was both amusing and a bit of unintentional commentary from WWE regarding their penchant for unsatisfying finishes.  ***3/4

Overall the strongest match of the night, most unexpectedly, was the Cody Rhodes-Brock Lesnar rubber match, which from where I sit marked Brock's best work since the 2019 SummerSlam.  This still suffered from Lesnar Repitition Syndrome, with Cody limiting his own moveset to match Brock's, and a long stretch where Brock was inexplicably trying to get a countout win over and over.  But ultimately the match worked in the same way as Brock vs. AJ in 2017 and Brock vs. Bryan in 2018 did.  Cody overcame all the punishment and hit three CrossRhodes in a row to put a decisive end to this feud.  Brock then took off his MMA gloves, shook Cody's hand, and hugged him, in an apparently unplanned show of respect.  Good stuff overall.  ****

WWE SummerSlam 2023 Preview & Predictions

This Saturday is the 2023 edition of WWE SummerSlam, and for the first time in several years the lineup actually looks befitting the company's second-biggest show of the year.  Mostly anyway.  Once again there are a couple important matches being left off the card, and even stranger they've added a battle royal with no real prize at stake, but hey, at least Shinsuke Nakamura's on a WWE PPV again....

There are actually more than a few bouts that could steal this show, something that hasn't been true of a WWE PPV in quite some time.  I know which match I think will earn Match of the Night honors, but on a given day I could see five of these matches do so.  The big stories going in are of course the neverending Bloodline soap opera, the Cody-Brock rubber match (to cap off a feud the company never came up with an adequate storyline reason for), Finn Balor going for perhaps his last chance at a top title while his stablemate waits in the wings with a briefcase, and two MMA fighters finally colliding in a wrestling ring.  Let's get into the lineup....

SummerSlam Battle Royal

So yeah, why are we doing this?  Just to get LA Knight on the card?  What does he get if he wins?  Nothing?  Anyway like I said, at least Nakamura's on a PPV for the first time in like a year and a half.  Remember when they made a big deal out of his return after 'Mania?  And then nothing really happened with him after that?  When's his contract up again?  And hey, what happened to Rhea Ripley vs. Raquel Rodriguez??

Pick: LA Knight

Logan Paul vs. Ricochet

Well this is pretty amazing.  Ricochet actually gets a one-on-one match at a major WWE event?  I never thought I'd see the day again.  There's zero chance he wins here, this is just a showcase for Logan against a guy who can more than keep up with him in the highspot department.  But it should be a helluva fun match and the first possible show stealer.

Pick: Logan Paul