Wednesday, March 6, 2019

WWE Fastlane 2019 Preview & Predictions

We've reached our final PPV Predictions piece for the 2018-2019 season, so get ready to kick into high gear on the Road to WrestleMania, because it's time to rev up your engines in the FASTLANE!!!  God what a stupid name for a PPV...

Anyway, this show is strangely not stacked, like an old In Your House show from the 90s.  But there's some potentially very enjoyable stuff on tap here, including a one-last-time Shield reunion, a big women's rematch with WrestleMania implications, and the one I'm excited about, a dream match of ROH alumni (Correct me if I'm wrong but I don't recall ever seeing Danielson vs. Steen back in the day).  This should be the second consecutive WWE PPV to go less than 3-1/2 hours, which is always refreshing these days.

Let's get to it.

***Heading into the final PPV of the season I'm ahead with 69% (88/127), Landon's next with 66% (84/127), and the Moore boys are tied with 65% (83/127).***

Pre-Show: Rey Mysterio vs. Andrade

Okay, this is fucked that these guys are on the pre-show.  This is I think the fourth televised singles match of this feud and deserves to be on the main card.  They'd better at least be building to a 'Mania match that'll get a good spot, because Rey and Andrade tear it up every time.  I'll go with Andrade to win here, setting up their big rematch.

Justin: Andrade
Dan: Rey
Landon: Andrade
Dave: Andrade

Smackdown Tag Team Championship: The Usos vs. Shane McMahon & The Miz

Ugh, this again.  Their match at Chamber was fine, if forgettable, but Shane desperately needs to stop trying to do this shit.  He looks winded, sweaty and purple halfway through every match and seems hell-bent on dying in the ring.  Stop it.  Shane vs. Miz is obviously happening at 'Mania so they're not winning the belts back.  This is the beginning of the end for MizMahon.

Justin: Usos retain
Dan: Twinsies
Landon: Usos
Dave: Usos, but let this be it with this feud.

Smackdown Women's Championship: Asuka vs. Mandy Rose

I really hope they have someone good in mind to face Asuka at 'Mania, because this pairing kinda stinks.  Mandy has thus far shown zero in-ring that tells me she's #1 contender material.  If anything Sonya Deville is the worker of the team.  At one point they were planning on Asuka vs. Lacey Evans at 'Mania, but that idea sucks too.  Call up Kairi Sane, will ya?  This match should probably be a squash.

Justin: Asuka retains
Dan: Asuka
Landon: Asuka
Dave: Asuka

RAW Tag Team Championship Triple Threat Match: The Revival vs. Chad Gable & Bobby Roode vs. Aleister Black & Ricochet

This should be fantastic if given enough time.  Dash & Dawson are awesome, Gable & Roode have become a fine team, and Black & Ricochet are both great.  Gable and Ricochet should have some wild exchanges.  I have no idea where they're going with this division, or Black & Ricochet since they're on all three brands right now.  I guess I'll pick them to win?

Justin: Black & Ricochet
Dan: Revival
Landon: Revival
Dave: I'll stick with the Revival

Women's Tag Team Championship: Sasha Banks & Bayley vs. Nia Jax & Tamina

I'd have thought Mandy & Sonya would get the first crack at the new champs since they were the last team eliminated in the Chamber, but nope, Jax & Tamina are up first.  This could be good or it could suck.  Depends whether Nia has her working boots on.  I can't imagine they'd already take the belts off the inaugural champions, but WWE's booking has been arbitrary as fuck lately.

Justin: Sasha & Bayley retain
Dan: Yes
Landon: Champs retain
Dave: Sasha & Bayley

The Shield vs. Drew McIntyre, Bobby Lashley & Baron Corbin

Well, this'll probably be the last ride ever for the Hounds of Justice, since as of now Dean Ambrose is still taking a hike after WrestleMania, likely to AEW I imagine.  The speculation is that this match will close the show, but if you ask me it's absurd that this would get higher billing than the WWE Championship.  The Shield farewell is obviously a big deal, but they're up against three pieces of severely damaged goods.  Drew Mac and Lashley are both solid upper midcard heels but they haven't been very well protected, and FOR THE LOVE OF FUCK, get Corbin off my television.  Stop featuring him.  He's only there at this point as a way for Vince to troll the audience.  He stinks.  I wonder if this match sets up Roman vs. Dean at 'Mania.  Maybe Dean's been suckering Seth and Roman in just to screw 'em over again. 

Justin: Conventional wisdom says The Shield is a mortal lock, but I'm gonna go with the swerve and pick the heels by some nefarious means.
Dan: Shield
Landon: SHIELD
Dave: The Shield

Becky Lynch vs. Charlotte

And here's how we end up with a three-way at 'Mania.  Becky has to beat Charlotte here to get back into the title match.  As I mentioned before, this has been the single most convoluted means of turning a singles match into a Triple Threat that I've ever been privy to.  Christ on a pogo stick.  Anyway, these two always deliver and should again here.

Justin: Becky wins obviously
Dan: Come on
Landon: Becky
Dave: Becky

WWE Championship: Daniel Bryan vs. Kevin Owens

I'm putting this last because it should be the main event by all rights.  Owens kinda got stiffed in the long run - the plan was originally for him to be built up as Bryan's WrestleMania challenger, which would've probably worked better in the context of this particular feud.  Owens has been a career heel in WWE, and Vince randomly throwing him into this match, screwing over the red-hot Kofi Kingston isn't winning Owens any sympathy.  I get it though, Kofi is the man of the hour and the smart business move is to save Bryan-Kofi for the biggest show.  Regardless though, this should be great.  I'm hoping for an ROH-style epic, and let's hope they don't get stuck in a bad spot like Bryan-AJ did at the Rumble.

Justin: Bryan retains so he can fight Kofi
Dan: Bryan
Landon: Bryan retains
Dave: The Champ retains (This card sucks).

That's the lineup.  It's very modest, almost like a loaded RAW episode rather than a PPV, but it's got some good potential.  By next week we should have a much clearer WrestleMania picture.

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