WWE Fastlane 2018: The Pieces Are In Place

That there was a mildly enjoyable fluff show that further set up stuff for WrestleMania.  In that regard, WWE Fastlane 2018 was a success.  It was easy to watch, the matches were all decent at worst, the main event was a fun little action movie, and the booking was logical.  Not much to complain about here, and thus far the 2018 WrestleMania season has been the strongest in several years. 

The opening match kinda set the tone for the whole show, as it was a fun little 15-minute Nakamura-Rusev back-and-forth.  Both guys got their major stuff in and while the middle was a bit slow and rest hold-heavy, the last third was pretty exciting and had good false finishes.  The best spot of the match was Rusev countering the Kinshasa with a side kick that turned Nak inside out.  Minutes later Nak countered the Accolade by slipping out behind Rusev and leveling him with a Kinshasa before finishing him with a second one.  The crowd liked this and it got across that Nakamura is ready for his WrestleMania moment.

Another solid match followed, one that I liked more than I expected to.  Bobby Roode and Randy Orton, two babyfaces who are much better suited to be heels based on their personas and in-ring style, nonetheless put together a very well-worked 19-minute US Title match.  The third act felt a bit overly long but considering there was a title change it seemed appropriate in hindsight.  After several finisher attempts by both guys, Roode leapt off the top rope into a sudden RKO, which gave Orton the one active championship he's never won.  Post-match Jinder Mahal came out and confronted Orton before Roode laid him out with a Glorious DDT.  Obviously a triple threat at WrestleMania is in the cards.  This match was pretty good.

The one filler match of the night was next as Natalya and Carmella faced Becky Lynch and Naomi.  This was standard free TV stuff but it was inoffensive.  Nattie and Carmella won as expected to keep Carmella's briefcase cash-in on the table.  Rumor is she may cash in at 'Mania but lose, which is the right move.  I'm still baffled that Carmella got to be the first women's Money in the Bank winner.

Movie Review: A Wrinkle In Time (2018)

by Mike Drinan

@mdrinan380

The film adaptation of the 1962 children's novel of the same name was directed Ava DuVernay and stars Oprah Winfrey, Mindy Kaling and Reese Witherspoon. It’s about Meg (played wonderfully by Storm Reid), a thirteen-year-old who is struggling, emotionally and academically, with the four-year disappearance of her scientist father (played by Chris Pine). She is considered an outcast and is subjected to teasing and taunting from her classmates, but is constantly supported by her younger brother Charles Wallace, who seems to be somewhat of a genius. Meg and her brother are visited by three supernatural beings (Winfrey, Witherspoon and Kaling) who explain they are here to help them find their father. From there they go across time and space to rescue him while simultaneously combating the ever-present and manipulating thing called “The It”.

I was looking forward to seeing this film and watching this fantasy adventure play out. Having Ava DuVernay directing was exciting for me too since she was behind really good films such as Selma and the Netflix documentary, 13th. She is a gifted director capable of making different kinds of movies and I was very interested to see what she would do with this story. When I left the theater after seeing it, I thought it was a really good kids movie with some easy to overlook flaws. It had a lot of colors, great energy, great messages, relatable characters and some funny moments. Then after thinking about it for some time, I realized that the kids in our theater didn’t have any kind of reaction throughout the entire film. They didn’t laugh at the funny parts and there wasn’t any kind of chatter at any point. Even when walking out of the theater nobody was really talking about it. It didn’t feel as if the intended audience for this film was engaged with it, and now I can see why.

This movie was pretty bad, even for a kids movie.

This was a CGI-heavy film, obviously, and there were moments that were visually stunning. The first planet the characters visit, with the flowers that love to gossip, was really great to watch and very vibrant and imaginative. But then, when they visit the Happy Medium, the effects were just straight up terrible and the green screen horribly noticeable, causing the scene to be unbelievable and cheesy.

Aside from Storm Reid, the acting in this film is subpar. Reese Witherspoon seems to be phoning it in and Mindy Kaling and Oprah don’t really do much of anything. Chris Pine was pretty good even though his role is rather limited in the film.

The characters themselves, aside from Meg, are pretty bland too. Mrs. Which, Mrs. Whatsit and Mrs. Who are supposed to be these supernatural beings that come to help Meg find her father, but don’t seem to do much helping. They can’t even show Meg how to tesser correctly and that’s kind of a bummer since that’s how they’re supposed to travel through space and time. Thanks! Also, the character of Charles Wallace in this film is vomit-inducing. So bad! When you give a kid the kind of dialogue that is meant for adults, it’s supposed to be fun and quirky. None of that happens here. It’s comes across as unnatural, unfunny and down right weird.

Then there’s this Calvin kid who just seems to appear out of nowhere, with the exception of a single shot of him in school watching Meg get teased about her father disappearing. There’s no backstory to this character and there’s no depth to him aside from having issues with his father. Oh boy! A popular rich white kid with daddy issues. Yipeeeee!

PICKLES' RANTINGS: TOP 10 SONGS EVER

And now we turn the floor over to our insane friend, Scotty Pickles, discussing the greatest songs ever. All typos preserved in their original packaging. 

A real top 10 songs list. No opinion just facts..........

10.) Revolution- The Beatles

This song is a true great from John’s vocals to George’s grinding guitar the song speaks to every generation that feels the need to revolt. And I mean revolting for the right reasons, like fighting agents an oppressive government, and not sitting on a lawn crying because no one is hiring people with degrees in archaeology.

9.) Stairway to Heaven-Led Zeppelin 

Where do I begin with this classic? This isn’t a stairway it’s a roller coaster of tempo and sound. The song has three sections, each one progressively increasing in tempo and volume. The song begins in a slow tempo with acoustic instruments (guitar and recorders) before introducing electric instruments. The final section is an hard rock anthem with Jimmy Paige’s classic hard rock guitar and Robert Plant’s screeching vocals.

Parents' Night In #2: Ferris Bueller's Day Off (1986)

Welcome to Episode #2 of Parents' Night In, where Kelly and I drink booze and watch movies!  This week we're talkin' about the John Hughes classic Ferris Bueller's Day Off!

Episode 1

Episode 3

WWE Fastlane 2018 Preview & Predictions

Jeezus, another freakin' WWE PPV to predict?  Whatever happened to a six-week (or more) build to WrestleMania?  I miss those days.

Anyway, the final Smackdown-only PPV (before the PPVs all become dual-branded going forward due to so many weak-ass single-brand PPVs) looks to be a mildly entertaining if kinda pointless affair, with a big clusterfuck main event (I'm really getting tired of those) and a few undercard bouts of interest before the Showcase of the Immortals fully takes shape.  Barring any unforeseen fuckups on WWE's part, this year's WrestleMania could actually be a pretty damn good show.  Stay the course, fellas.....

Anyway, let's do this.

***Heading into the 2017-18 season home stretch I'm in the lead with 85/114 (74.5%), Landon's in second with 70/102 (72.5%), Dave's got 57/80 (71%), and Dan's mathematically eliminated with 70/114 (61%)***

Smackdown Tag Team Championship: The Usos vs. The New Day

This here is a sign that the blue brand ain't got shit going on in this division at the moment.  We've seen this match literally a thousand times.  I know the Bludgeon Brothers are on their way up and will almost certainly win gold in the next month or two, but jeezus does this reek of treading water.  The match should be good, but the question is do we need to see it again?

Justin: I have a suspicion Harper & Rowan get involved here, maybe even destroying both teams and making this a draw so there can be a 3-way match at 'Mania.  Either way it doesn't make sense to change the belts on this show.  Usos retain somehow.
Dan: Yeah
Landon: Usos
Dave: Usos

Becky Lynch & Naomi vs. Natalya & Carmella

Yikes, aside from whatever Charlotte is involved with there is nary a compelling women's feud on Smackdown.  Everyone's just sorta waiting their turn to go after the belt.  Nattie thinks she's challenging Charlotte after this, but we still don't know which belt Asuka's going after next month.

Justin: Becky beat Carmella on Smackdown this week, which means Carmella's team wins here.  50-50, even Steven, Roger-Roger--- oh wait, that's from Star Wars.
Dan: Becky again
Landon: Carmella & Natalya
Dave: No idea.  Carmella and the other chick.

Smackdown Women's Championship: Charlotte vs. Ruby Riott

One of two matches where a prominent 'Mania participant is being kept busy till New Orleans.  Riott has zero chance of taking the belt here.  The match should be decent.

Justin: Charlotte retains
Dan: Yeah
Landon: Charlotte needs to be ready for Asuka.  (Editor's Note: NO ONE is ready for Asuka)
Dave: Charlotte

Is Cocaine Really Addictive?: An Investigative Report

by Dan Moore
@SouthieDanimal

I’ve been writing for this website for a few years now and I’ve noticed most of these articles are jokey, silly nonsense. Well, faithful reader, I want to jump into some real Journalism. That’s capital J type journalism. I’m ready to hit the streets and dive into what has been called a most addictive drug: Cocaine. That’s right. I watch 20/20. I know the statistics. Kids are out there dying from, I assume, cocaine overdoses. I will attempt to see the how and the why of this terrible disease first person.

It’s not just for breakfast anymore.  

First, I had to procure some cocaine. Easier said than done. I had to google map my directions to the nearest ghetto. I trekked down dark alleys, avoiding guns, knives and ninja stars just to find a dealer willing to part with some of that sweet toot he be slanging.  JK. I went to one bar in Southie and BOOM, I was offered a bag of affordable booger sugar.

Thankfully, he had some he could spare

He asked me not to use his real name so I’ll refer to him as Snorty McSideSniffs. Snorty was a jumpy fellow with a black eye & maybe 4 teeth. I barely sat down before he was offering up the fast white lady. We settled on a price of $100 for a bag, which may seem like too much or too little, I don’t know, I’m a novice here. Before I could pay him, however, he was asked to a meeting in the men’s room by a much bigger man who also asked me not use his real name. We’ll call him Smokey McBongWater. Smokey needed to talk to Snorty immediately about “harvesting his broccoli” which Snorty wanted nothing to do with. They were in the bathroom a really long time and I was parked in a handicap spot. I wrote an IOU because the bartender saw me take the bag and I wanted to show how honest I was. 

Oscars 2018 Recap

The 90th Oscars are behind us, and Mike and I are here to give you our thoughts....

Justin: So Mike, how 'bout them Oscars?  The big categories were all predictable in a good way; for the most part everything that won deserved to.  Best Picture was of course a coin flip between the two front runners.  I'd be lying if I said I'm super excited The Shape of Water won; it was very good but probably my least favorite of this year's crop (that I've seen).  On the other hand it is the first fantasy film to win Best Picture since Return of the King, and only the second ever.  The Academy really needs to nominate more sci-fi/fantasy films.  Also of note is that Shape was the first film since The Artist to win both Best Pic and Best Director.  When I was younger those two categories seemed to rarely split, but in recent years it's been the norm.

Kimmel was a very likable, entertaining host like last year.  His comedy was understated but included some great one-liners and jabs.  They didn't beat us over the head with the political material but it was definitely there, and they kept an air of positivity even when discussing heavy topics.

The winner I'm most excited about is of course Gary Oldman, who after 25 years of incredible performances is finally an Oscar winner.  I'm curious what he's like in real life; his red carpet interview and acceptance speech gave off an air of gentlemanly humility.  He seems such a likable chap.

I was very glad to see Frances McDormand and Sam Rockwell take home their well-deserved statues.  Their Three Billboards performances were both incredible and formed a wonderful counterpoint to each other.

Allison Janney's win was also great to see.  I've been a big fan of hers since Drop Dead Gorgeous ("No, she's just screamin' 'Mom, Mom!' 'cause she's got Tourette's, she's Annette's kid, dipshit.") and she's impressed me in everything she's done since.  Her turn as Tonya Harding's abusive, domineering mother was brutally honest.

I was also happy to see Blade Runner win a couple awards (though as I said, Apes should've won Best Visual Effects); that film was criminally underappreciated at the box office, much like its predecessor.  Roger Deakins absolutely deserved the statue, as BR2049 is a breathtaking-looking film.  Perhaps in thirty years we'll all be talking about what a genre classic it was, in anticipation of Blade Runner 2079....

Overall another enjoyable ceremony with some good laughs, a few touching moments, and winners I mostly agreed with.

Oh, and how in god's name do you invite Eddie Vedder to sing during the In Memoriam video but not have him perform a Chris Cornell song???

Your take?

Top Ten Things: Gary Oldman Performances

Welcome to another Top Ten Things, here at Enuffa.com!

Well it's finally happened.  After literally decades of being all but ignored by The Academy, Oscar has at long last recognized one of the great actors of our time (of any time really) with a golden statue.  The phrase "Academy Award-winner Gary Oldman" is finally a thing.  It feels so good to be able to say that.  

Like so many other moviegoers, I first became aware of Oldman because of his starring role in Bram Stoker's Dracula, where he delivered an operatic, blood and thunder portrayal of one of literature's most famous figures.  His performance was so physical, over-the-top, and otherworldly (aided by some stunning makeup and prosthetics) that it immediately became my favorite rendition of the undead Count.  It was one of those eye-opening performances (like Heath Ledger in The Dark Knight) that touched a nerve for me, and I was instantly converted into an Oldman devotee.  I sought out all his previous work (unbeknownst to me I'd already seen Gary as Lee Harvey Oswald in JFK) and eagerly anticipated every new Gary Oldman film for years; even when the movies themselves were less than stellar, his performances were always worth the price of admission.

But which of his roles have stood the test of time?  Which stack up as his defining work?  Let's take a look....

10. Jean-Baptiste Emmanuel Zorg (The Fifth Element)

One of Oldman's strengths as an actor is disappearing into characters.  In Luc Besson's sci-fi epic, Oldman transformed into the film's main villain, Zorg, a mercenary industrialist and weapons manufacturer with a southern accent and bucked teeth.  Along with the bizarre, futuristic fashion, Oldman's mannerisms were unlike those of any role he'd played before, and he stole the show in this film, all the while clearly having a helluva good time.

9. Mason Verger (Hannibal)

Speaking of transforming, Oldman was made up to be completely unrecognizable as the loathsome, disfigured pedophile Mason Verger, who'd run afoul of Hannibal Lecter and been made a faceless cripple.  Despite a mountain of prosthetics, Oldman was able to deliver a palpably creepy, hateful performance as a villain so awful he actually made serial killer Lecter seem sympathetic by comparison.  No small feat.

8. Milton Glenn (Murder in the First)

One of the earliest Oldman roles I felt warranted an Oscar nod was his supporting turn as Alcatraz Deputy Warden Milton Glenn, a prim and proper but covertly sadistic monster who'd been essentially left to rule the prison on his own, with an inhuman iron fist.  Glenn is depicted torturing the film's protagonist Henri Young (Kevin Bacon), and Oldman plays the character with understated but deeply terrifying menace; a quintessential authority figure gone rogue.

7. Sid Vicious (Sid & Nancy)

One of Oldman's first starring roles was as drug-addled, anarchic punk rock legend Sid Vicious, in this intimate character study by director Alex Cox.  Oldman and his co-star Chloe Webb showed intensely dysfunctional chemistry as the title couple, and the film follows their chaotic misadventures amid the 70s punk scene in London and New York, culminating in their premature, heroin-assisted demise.  Oldman exhibits here his naturally compelling film presence, bringing to life this frenzied punk icon in a Herculean effort.

Parents' Night In #1: Big (1988)

It's our debut episode of Parents' Night In, where Kelly and I enjoy some beverages and watch one of our favorite movies (and yours too)!  This week's installment we'll be discussing the 1988 classic comedy Big, starring Tom Hanks!

Enjoy!

Subscribe to us on YouTube and join us on Facebook and Google+!

Episode 2

Episode 3

90th Academy Awards Preview & Predictions

What's up everyone?  It's late February, and that means only one thing: spring is almost here!  Wait, no.....  It means the Academy Awards are almost upon us.  And for us at Enuffa.com that means it's time for Mike Drinan (@mdrinan380) and I to offer our predictions!

I dunno about you Mike, but for me 2017 was one of the best film years I can remember.  Between some pretty stellar "serious films" and just a bevy of quality popcorn movies (Logan, Apes 3, It, Blade Runner, Last Jedi, Guardians 2, etc.), it was hard for me to even nail down my five favorites.  More on that in a future column...

I still have some catching up to do but this year's slate of nominees is first-rate thus far (I've seen five of the nine Best Pic nominees as of now), which should make for an exciting Oscars ceremony (If you're into that sorta thing).  I'm glad Jimmy Kimmel is back as the host; I thought he was unexpectedly great in the role last year, offering his dry style of humor, and with Hollywood being so politically charged nowadays Kimmel will have the opportunity to add some heartfelt comments as he's been doing on his own show.

But let's get to the categories.

Best Picture

Call Me By Your Name

Darkest Hour

Dunkirk

Get Out

Lady Bird

Phantom Threat

The Post

The Shape of Water

Three Billboards Outside Ebbing, MO

Justin: I've been impressed with the five Best Pic nominees I've seen (Three Billboards, Get Out, The Shape of Water, Lady Bird, and Dunkirk), my favorite being Three Billboards, a dark comedy with sociopolitical undertones and big performances that would make the Coen Brothers proud.  Lady Bird was a wonderfully understated coming of age story, Get Out was a gleefully disturbing Twilight Zone-esque thriller, Dunkirk was an unusual take on the war genre, and The Shape of Water was another grown-up fairy tale from Guillermo del Toro.  All signs point to this being a two-horse race between Billboards or The Shape of Water, if the previous awards shows have been any indication.  I could very easily see it going either way, but with Oscar's aversion to fantasy films, and my own personal preference for Billboards, I'm going with that.

Prediction: Three Billboards


Mike:  I've only seen five as well (Three Billboards, The Post, Get Out, Lady Bird, and Dunkirk) and have also been impressed and can see why each one has received the nomination for the big prize. My favorite this year has been Lady Bird. It was an exceptionally made film that really showed the depth, quirks and love of a mother-daughter relationship, a relationship that truly hasn't been shown on film, ever. Get Out was a deftly constructed horror-ish film and a significant commentary on racism. It was thrilling, suspenseful and entertaining. Dunkirk told the story of a well known historic event in a very unique and interesting way with a cast that really brought the human, emotional punch that is needed with a military film. Three Billboards was a great dark comedy that explored the trappings of acting on anger, and you're right, this film would've made the Coen Brothers proud. It hits on every note, takes some unexpected turns and the acting is top notch, not to mention a strong, determined female lead which will go a long way with voters, especially with everything going on in Hollywood these days.

Also, please dear Lord can we not have a screw up like last year in announcing the winner?

Prediction: Three Billboards

Best Director

Christopher Nolan (Dunkirk)

Jordan Peele (Get Out)

Greta Gerwig (Lady Bird)

Paul Thomas Anderson (Phantom Thread)

Guillermo del Toro (The Shape of Water)

Justin: Phantom Thread is the only one of these I haven't seen (hoping to remedy that this weekend), but all four remaining directorial endeavors have been quite admirable.  If I had my pick I'd probably go with Gerwig, for her note-perfect solo debut behind the camera.  While I wouldn't be surprised to see her take it, I think this'll be del Toro's night to grab the gold, splitting the two big categories between the two frontrunners.

Prediction: Guillermo del Toro


Mike: I've got a couple of favorites in this category. Jordan Peele absolutely did a marvelous job crafting Get Out to the point where every time you watch the film you'll pick up on something that you might've missed before. The story is thorough and the nightmare he installed with "the sunken place" still gives me chills and takes my breath away. I've been a fan of Greta Gerwig's as an actor since she was in Greenberg. As a director of Lady Bird, she hit one out of the park on her first go 'round and I can't wait to own this film and see what she does next. Everything about the film is wonderful and enjoyable. Christopher Nolan is one of my favorite directors working because he hasn't made a terrible movie from what I've seen. After being lauded and commercially successful for ages he's finally got his nomination for directing. He wields a technical mastery that is unfortunately matched by Guillermo del Toro, who is the odds on favorite in this category. In my Oscar nomination reaction piece back in January, I said that this category is Greta's to lose. Sadly, I have to go back on that and put my chips on del Toro as well.

Prediction: Guillermo del Toro

WWE Elimination Chamber 2018 Review: Still Trying to Make "Fetch" Happen

The WrestleMania 34 card is taking shape, and there are two major bits of news coming out of Elimination Chamber.  Both of these items played out as expected, and people seem to be complaining about them as though they're surprised.  I'm excited for one, indifferent toward the other.

The first big news is that Ronda Rousey will indeed be competing at WrestleMania, and all signs point to a mixed tag match against Triple H and Stephanie, likely with Kurt Angle as Ronda's tag partner.  I'm fine with all of this - it's a payoff that was teased three years ago, and Angle makes perfect sense to team with Ronda.  Both have a legitimate combat sports background, both were highly touted as major acquisitions for WWE, and with Angle blowing the whistle on the Helmsleys' subterfuge during the contract signing, it seems appropriate for him to volunteer.  This won't be a five-star classic, but it'll be a high profile way to introduce Ronda as a full-fledged WWE wrestler, it keeps Hunter out of one of the long matches of the night, and it's a big box office attraction-type match.  Yes, the Boss vs. Wrestler feud has been done to death, but the fact that it's the female version of that angle gives it a different flavor, and after this blows over Ronda can be incorporated fully into the women's division.  This'll be fine.

The other news is that Roman Reigns is once again headlining WrestleMania.  Sigh.  There's nothing surprising about this, and Brock vs. Roman will likely be a better overall match than Brock vs. Braun would've been.  But with the way Braun was booked in this Chamber match it really should be him in the main event, having an all-out car collision of a match with Brock.  Now I'm not sure how they resolve the unfinished business with Strowman, unless Brock re-signs, nor do I have any idea what Strowman's 'Mania plans are.  It is strange that both big 'Mania matches set up last night are payoffs from three years ago.  At least the long-term storytelling is in place there.

The show itself was solid stuff.  The non-Chamber matches were nothing spectacular, but none of them were really bad either.

WWE Elimination Chamber 2018 Preview & Predictions

Welcome to another round of WWE Predictions here at Enuffa.com!

Shockingly WWE pulled off a pretty damn good Royal Rumble last month, delivering two very strong Rumble bouts (the men's match ranks very high on my all-time Rumble list) and a solid undercard to boot.  Let's hope they can keep the creative momentum going.  With Vince focused on relaunching the XFL (I still can't believe it) it really seems like Triple H and Steph have taken a bigger role in putting together these shows.  The Rumble PPV seemed to be missing Vince's fingerprints, as did this week's RAW which included a 107-minute gauntlet match (Vince Russo's head must've exploded - he coulda fit 15 Something-on-a-Pole matches into that window).  This Chamber show has a lot of potential despite the overcrowding of the men's Chamber and the silly booking leading to it.  I have fairly high expectations for both of these matches.

So let's get down to bidness...

***I'm at 80/109 (73%), Landon's at 69/97 (71%), Dave's got 52/75 (69%), and Dan's trailing badly with 66/109 (60%)***

"Woken" Matt Hardy vs. Bray Wyatt

This match was already given away on free TV a few weeks back, so the first-time aspect is gone.  I haven't seen much at all of Matt Hardy's resurrected TNA persona, but from what I've read WWE has completely fucked it up.  Yet another reason why scripted promos don't work.  Just let the guy do his thing for Chrissake.  Nothing much at stake in this match, both guys are kinda treading water.  Hey, whatever happened to the Sister Abigail character?  Wyatt was supposed to debut it last fall but he got sick and was pulled off the show, and they just forgot about it after that.

Justin: It literally does not matter who wins this.  I'm guessing both guys get thrown into the Andre Battle Royal at 'Mania, so who cares?  Bray won the match in January so I'll pick Matt here.  50-50 booking....
Dan: Woken.  They done fucked this feud up already though.
Landon: IT'S 50-50, MOTHERFUCKERS.  Matt wins.
Dave: No idea.  Sister Abigail.  (Matt, whatever)

RAW Tag Team Championship: The Bar vs. Titus Worldwide

Not sure what Titus and Crews did to earn a title shot, but whatever.  I'm glad Cesaro and Sheamus are on the card at least.  With Jason Jordan on the shelf and that feud now finished, I have no idea what the plan is for The Bar going forward - probably a multi-team match at 'Mania again.  Regardless, C&S just won back the belts so they ain't losing 'em here.

Justin: The Bar retains

Dan: The Bar

Landon: The Bar

Dave: The Bar

Asuka vs. Nia Jax

The stipulation here is that if Nia wins she gets added to Asuka's WrestleMania match for the RAW Women's Title.  Only problem is Asuka hasn't confirmed which title she's going for.  So what if Nia wins and then Asuka's like "Nah, I'm gonna fight Charlotte instead?"  This should all be moot, since ending Asuka's streak here would be the stupidest thing ever.  But I wouldn't put it past them either.  I'm guessing Asuka wins here, decides to challenge Charlotte, and Nia gets the shot at Alexa Bliss anyway by winning some kinda #1 contenders match on RAW.

Justin: Asuka
Dan: Come on.
Landon: Asuka
Dave: Asuka

Wrestling Interview: Sydal Still Soaring

by Ryan K. Boman of TheGorillaPosition.com

If you’re looking for Matt Sydal these days, all you have to do is look up.

UP… as in far above the ring, where the high-flying veteran has spent a good portion of his 18-year professional career. And WAY UP, as the man currently standing atop Impact Wrestling’s X-Division, after capturing the championship from Taiji Ishimori on January 12, at a recent set of Impact! tapings.

He spoke with TheGorillaPosition.com this week, and discussed his current run in Impact Wrestling, as well as a decorated career that took flight when he was just a teenager.

Still just 34 years old, it seems almost impossible to believe that Sydal made his debut with Gateway Championship Wrestling in St. Louis all the way back in 2000. In doing so, he also became the first person under the age of 18 to receive a wrestler’s license from The State of Missouri.

“I was trained at the GCW training center in Florissant, Missouri,” Sydal recalled, “I started out going to the shows as a fan. I was still in high school, but when I found out there was local wrestling, it absolutely blew my mind.”

“That’s what sealed the deal for me. It wasn’t watching it on TV. It was seeing it live and up close that made me want to be a wrestler.”

Upon making his debut, Sydal quickly became known as one of themost dynamic daredevils on the independent circuit. He had a tremendous run in Ring of Honor in the early 2000’s, working with such stars as AJ Styles, Samoa Joe, and current Impact World Champion Austin Aries.

During this time, he would make appearances for  then-TNA Wrestling, including a pay-per-view match at Victory Road. His eye-popping talent eventually led him to a contract with WWE, where he performed under the name, Evan Bourne. His collaboration with Kofi Kingston, Air Boom, was a tremendous success and resulted in a WWE World tag team title reign.

“We had a ton of fun,” Sydal said, of his time teaming with Kingston. “I don’t want to say it was a precursor to The New Day, but I think that Air Boom had some of the same elements that New Day has now.”

Movie Review: Lady Bird (2017)

Lady Bird features one of the most authentic portrayals of a high schooler I've ever seen.  Saoirse Ronan's star-making turn as the title character envelops her completely, and she finds the exact balance of teen angst (both the romantic and career sort), social frontrunning (Lady Bird at one point seems to forsake her best friend for the popular girl in school), and deliberate quirkiness (who names themselves "Lady Bird?") without overplaying any of it.  This character is socially clumsy and unclear how much of the real world works, but like all teenagers thinks she has it all figured out.  Ronan isn't afraid to get her hands dirty, even becoming deeply unlikable at some moments.  In the end though, she's just a raging teenager trying to create opportunities in life by escaping the stagnancy of suburban Sacramento.

The other primary performance, just as integral to the film, is Laurie Metcalf (of Roseanne fame) as Lady Bird's judgmental, passive-aggressive mother Marion, who professes her deep motherly love one moment and denigrates her daughter's apparent lack of realistic ambition and intelligence the next.  Their tumultuous relationship is so genuine I felt like I was watching real-life family squabbling.  Metcalf has a few understated, show stealing moments that fully justify her first-time Oscar nomination (I love that this wonderfully talented actress is finally getting some real recognition - for more evidence of her abilities, watch the Roseanne episode "Crime and Punishment").

A senior in high school, Lady Bird fancies herself a future math major, but sadly isn't very good at math.  She tries her hand at drama club but fails to impress the director of the school play.  She goes through two love interests during the year, neither of which proves to be very compatible with her, for very different reasons.  Her newly unemployed father (a victim of the 2002 recession) agrees to secretly help her apply for financial aid so she can apply at some east coast colleges, while her mother resents her for even considering moving away.  The film plays out as a series of episodes throughout one school year, with the realism of a documentary.

One thing I was struck by was the film's refusal to pay off side characters in the expected fashion.  The school's popular girl Jenna is a bit of a bad influence on Lady Bird but also seems to genuinely like her, until their friendship is damaged by Lady Bird's dishonesty.  In a lesser film this would've led to Jenna publicly shaming Lady Bird at school, but here their bond just quietly fades.  Lady Bird's brother and his live-in girlfriend are another example - at the outset it seems like the two of them will be set up as antagonistic characters, but as it turns out both Miguel and Shelly are deceptively caring people.  There's a touching moment where the even-tempered Shelly takes Lady Bird aside to point out how good Marion has been to her.  I actually would've liked to spend more time with Lady Bird's siblings, but then the film's not really about them.  This story is about Lady Bird and how her life and perspective are shaped by her relationships with others. 

Lady Bird reminded me of 2007's Juno in some ways, but it felt more grounded in reality than that film; I always thought the dialogue in Juno seemed calculatingly literary in a way that didn't quite ring true.  Here everything feels totally real, to the point that I'd love to revisit this character in four or five years and see how everything turned out for her.  Greta Gerwig's directorial debut is quite something.

I give the film ***1/2 out of ****.



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WWE: Home of Copycats and Overcrowding

There are two rather infuriating trends taking hold in WWE these days.  The first is that Smackdown seems to be stealing all their ideas from what happens on RAW, while the second is the overthinking and overcrowding of PPV main events.

I'm not sure when the Smackdown writing team decided to just start copying whatever Team RAW does, but I first noticed it when they booked a trio of heel NXT call-ups to debut on Smackdown exactly ONE NIGHT after the same thing happened on RAW (minus Paige of course, who wasn't a call-up but a returning star).  Absolution, led by a black-haired gothy chick and featuring an eye-catching blonde and a tough-looking brunette, shows up on RAW and attacks a buncha women mid-match.  The very next night, The Riott Squad, led by a black-haired gothy chick and featuring an eye-catching blonde and a tough-looking brunette, shows up on Smackdown and attacks a buncha women mid-match.  Has WWE combined the writing teams or have they just not been talking to each other during the week to ensure there's no duplication of efforts?

No, you're not seeing double.  WWE did the same angle two nights in a row.

This copycat trend continued at the Royal Rumble, when both the WWE and Universal Title matches involved three men.  Yes, one of them was a handicap match as opposed to a Triple Threat, but come on, did we really need Kane added to the Lesnar-Strowman match?  The fight everyone wanted to see was Brock vs. Braun.  Adding Kane to the title picture diluted a potentially huge rematch (not to mention Kane hasn't been relevant since the Dubya administration), and it doesn't appear we'll be getting another one-on-one Lensar-Strowman encounter, unless WWE swerves us all at Elimination Chamber and has Braun go over instead of Roman.

And speaking of the Chamber, this week on RAW they held a Second Chance 4-way, errr, 5-way to determine the final participant in the men's Chamber match.  It was originally slated to be Finn Balor vs. Bray Wyatt vs. Matt Hardy vs. Apollo Crews, but midway through the show they added Seth Rollins to the match (since his program with Jason Jordan just evaporated due to Jordan's neck issues).  And thanks to a double-pin on Wyatt (which a referee with any experience wouldn't realistically count since two guys were pinning him), the match had co-winners in Balor and Rollins.  And rather than schedule a run-off match next week for the coveted Chamber spot, they just said "Fuck it, both guys are in!"  Huh??  So this Elimination Chamber is gonna have seven guys instead of six.  Does that mean three dudes start the match?  The Miz (who lost a match to determine the #1 entrant) and both Finn and Seth, since they back-doored their way into the Chamber?  This is just fuckin' goofy.  Why are these GMs taking such an "anything goes" approach?  How weak does it make the authority figure look when their solution to every booking conundrum is to simply throw their hands up?  How cheap does it make the title in question look when they keep adding contenders to every match?  Turns out you don't have to beat people to earn a title shot, you just have to not lose.  This is 50-50 booking gone berserk.

"Guess what Seth, we get to SHARE the 6th Chamber spot!"

Whatever, at least the Chamber match is pretty stacked (except for Elias, what the actual fuck is he doing here??).  The latest instance of Smackdown copycat booking however truly vexing.  The stage was set for AJ Styles to defend at Fastlane against either Sami Zayn or Kevin Owens, pending a #1 Contender's match between the two.  When that match went to a no-contest, what did they do?  You guessed it, they had the GM throw his hands up and say "Fuck it, BOTH guys get a title shot."  What is this, fuckin' Oprah?  "YOU get a title shot, and YOU get a title shot!"  So Owens and Zayn are both in, fine.  AJ vs. KO vs. Zayn would be a great triple threat match.  But wait.  A couple days later it's announced that Dolph Ziggler and Baron Corbin will have a match the following week to determine the fourth guy in the Fastlane main event.  Wait, what??  Ziggler and Corbin have no beef with AJ or Owens or Zayn, and have done literally nothing to earn a WWE Title shot.  Adding either of them to the match is nonsensical.  Know what's even more nonsensical?  Rebooking Smackdown so that it won't be Ziggler vs. Corbin at all; instead it'll be Corbin vs. Owens and Ziggler vs. Zayn, where if Ziggler and/or Corbin wins, he/they BOTH get added to the Fastlane main event.  Gee, I wonder what's gonna happen.....  What a shock, both guys won their respective matches and now it's a 5-way at Fastlane.  What is wrong with this company?  Shoehorning more guys into every PPV main event doesn't make them better.  Know what makes main event matches better?  A clear conflict between two participants, that the audience can get invested in.  Cluttering up the main event picture with guys who shouldn't be there creates unneeded parity and undermines the very idea of a main event, not to mention it leaves basically no one for the undercard matches. 

Quick name me a great 5-way match, ever.  I'll wait......

And isn't it a crazy coincidence that every #1 Contender's match lately has ended in some kind of indecisive scenario that necessitates BOTH guys getting what they want?  They may as well just hand out participation trophies at the beginning of every episode.  Let's just throw out the belts altogether, now every WWE Superstar is special!

The Royal Rumble gave me a real sense of optimism for this year's WrestleMania season, for the first time in years, but this wishy-washy booking is not instilling me with a lot of confidence, nor is the idea of Smackdown repeating everything RAW does.  Knock it off, jerks....



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The Great PPVs: WrestleKingdom 9

Welcome to the third installment of our Great PPVs series, here at Enuffa.com and TheGorillaPosition.com!  I hope you've enjoyed this weekly trip down nostalgia lane so far, as we reminisce about wrestling PPV events that transcended the genre and elevated the art form.

Today I'll be talking about a much more recent PPV, one that took place only three years ago but made a huge difference for me as a wrestling fan and likely had a similar effect on many of you.  I'm talking about NJPW's WrestleKingdom 9, which emanated from the legendary Tokyo Dome on January 4th, 2015.

WK9 was the first NJPW event to be shown on North American PPV systems and also served as the ribbon cutting show for the brand new NJPWWorld.com (New Japan's answer to the WWE Netowrk).  Prior to this event you could order NJPW shows on iPPV, but the North American audience for this product was scarce at the time.  What drew me to this show was not only the incredible buzz the New Japan product was getting, but the fact that Jim Ross would be returning to the broadcast booth for the first time in years.  That JR was lending his unparalleled announcing talents to a non-WWE show was of considerable significance and it gave the whole thing a must-see feel.  Unfortunately the only way you could get the English commentary was by ordering the show on traditional PPV, so for my first viewing I'd have to settle for the Japanese version on NJPW World (I've since become pretty fond of the over-the-top Japanese announcing despite the language barrier, but it took some getting used to).

But no matter, the anticipation going into this show was quite intense for New Japan fans, largely due to the hugeness of its main event - an IWGP Title rematch between the company's Ace, Hiroshi Tanahashi (essentially the John Cena of New Japan but with more of a Shawn Michaels in-ring style) and the heir apparent to lead the company into the next decade, Kazuchika Okada.  As I would learn, these two had built a stellar rivalry over the previous three years and delivered numerous Flair-Steamboat-esque classics.  The expectation was that this show would be the passing of the torch to the new face of the company.

My first viewing of WrestleKingdom 9 was a little strange since I knew very few faces on their roster.  Obviously AJ Styles was more than familiar to me, but aside from Kota Ibushi, Alex Shelley and The Young Bucks (all of whom I'd seen wrestle for Ring of Honor a few times) I didn't really know anyone else.  So initially all I had to go on was the match quality.  My appreciation for this show wouldn't fully emerge until I'd perused the NJPW library for a few months and then given it a second viewing.  And once I knew who the players were and what their matches meant, it was a whole new ball game.

The show kicked off with a wild four-way Jr. Tag Title match, as defending champs reDRagon faced the Bucks, Time Splitters (Kushida & Alex Shelley) and Forever Hooligans (Rocky Romero & Alex Koslov).  This would prove to be an excellent example of a hot opener, as all four teams worked at full speed to rev up the crowd.  After thirteen minutes of furious action, reDRagon retained their titles.  Time Splitters and Forever Hooligans would split shortly after this show, as Romero formed Roppongi Vice with Baretta, while Kushida became a permanent fixture of the Jr. singles division.

THE POWER OF THE PIN 2.5.18: Little Big Man

by Ryan K. Boman of TheGorillaPosition.com


N...X...T.

The first time I heard those three letters, I assumed it was another plateful of WWE fast food marketing, with extra fries, in an already-saturated market. Like many of the company's other 'side dishes', it wouldn't be the first recipe for disaster that Vince McMahon used to feed starving network executives.

In the beginning, it was just that: fat and puffy, a competition-about-wrestling-within-a-show, with all three of those parts being interchangeable.

Generally considered a gimmick-filled flop, fans couldn't take the original incarnation of the product seriously, despite it showcasing some great talent like EC3, Wade Barrett and Titus O'Neill. The WWE wouldn't stop meddling with the product, as if it kept pushing its latest brand extension to just follow along.

In its precocious, adolescent stage, NXT was nothing more than an annoying little brother to the parent company. The audience often treated it as a mere distraction from more important, grown-up things.

But like the sloppy, undersized kid who used to tag along, NXT eventually found its growth spurt. It even went through a puberty of sorts, when it was given full-fledged responsibilities in June 2012, replacing Florida Championship Wrestling as the flagship television show of WWE's developmental wing.

Things started to click from there, and the brand went from being an afterthought to an asset. And, what once appeared to be a creative sewage hole turned out to be WWE's fountain of youth.

A steady stream of top level indy performers have been a trademark of the brand, keeping things interesting for even the smartest of fans. The NXT loyals often speculate about who is coming to developmental in the future, and how they will fit in. The constant 'newness' and re-mix of talent makes the atmosphere there feel eternally young.

Super Bowl LII Prop Bets: Patriots vs Eagles

by Dan Moore (@SouthieDanimal) & Mike Parker (@UncleMiggsy) 

Here we are at the end of another football season. Lo and behold the Patriots are in the Super Bowl again. And what better way to celebrate them in the big game again then by betting on a bunch of stupid, trivial bullshit? (All odds & bets courtesy of Bovada) 

Dan's Choice: Tails hasn't failed me in years...but is it time for me to meet Heads again at the turn of the tide? Hmmmm...Here's the all time coin toss stats...

Tails has come up 4 times in a row...I'm sticking with TAILS, which is not only an excellent side of coin, but a hell of a Sonic the Hedgehog sidekick. 

His real name is Miles. MILES!!

Miggs' Choice: I’m going with HEADS. Any math nerd will tell you that the coin flip is 50/50 no matter what but I don’t buy that. Looks at all these winners named for the ol’ noggin.

Dan's Top 9: Patriots Super Bowl Appearances

by Dan Moore
@SouthieDanimal

The fact that I even get to write this list is RIDICULOUS. Nine Goddamn Super Bowl appearances with the tenth on the way. Absurd. It must kill all the other fan bases that this list can exist. I LOVE IT. It's gonna go from worst to first so here we go. 

9. SUPER BOWL XLII: Patriots vs. Giants

UGGGGH This one SUCKS to even think about. This is the one that really sticks in the craw with us spoiled Pats fans. It still hurts to think about it to this day. The unstoppable force. GONE.  The best offense ever. GONE. The Perfect Season. GONE. All because of this fucking helmet catch. 

8. SUPER BOWL XXXI: Patriots vs. Packers

This was the first real memory I have of one of my sports teams being in the big one. I was 17 during this game and I remember being at my aunt's house with all my friends and family watching this, hoping to see a championship. Alas, notorious genital photographer Bret Favre killed that dream, along with Desmond Howard's stupid kick return. Goddammit. 

Plus, they were very mean to my friend Drew. 

7. SUPER BOWL XLVI: Patriots vs. Giants

Deja fucking vu. The rematch was AWFUL too. I was convinced the Pats would get them on the second try. As it turns out, the Giants ended up being the white whale to the Patriots Ahab. 

A big, dumb white whale. 

6. SUPER BOWL XX: Patriots vs. Bears

This loss barely registers. I was seven when this game was played. I don't remember much at all except a big fat guy with a football improbably hitting paydirt, and that was my Uncle Benny when he hit one of his squares. (As much as these losses stink, it really is a joy being able to write about the NINE TIMES the Patriots have been to the Super Bowl. Yeah, Super Bowl losses suck, but being a Patriots fan is the best. We know another opportunity to win one is right around the corner. That's not arrogance. It's LIFE). 

5. SUPER BOWL XXIX: Patriots vs. Eagles

Now we're getting to the good stuff. The victory that solidified the Pats as a dynasty is also their least memorable in terms of winning. Seriously, the biggest moment everyone remembers from this game is Donovan yakking all over himself. 

"I'm so sick of losing, I could puke!"

4. SUPER BOWL XXXVIII: Patriots vs. Panthers

The Super Bowl where people started to notice "wait a minute...these Patriots might not be a fluke." I got so excited for this one cause they could be one of those dominant teams people talked about like the Cowboys or the Niners. Little did I know they'd eclipse both those teams. 

3. SUPER BOWL XLIX: Patriots vs. Seahawks

I wanted this game. NEEDED this game. After all the bullshit about air in footballs and how Brady sucked unless his balls were squishy (heh), I needed this team to take home the trophy. And it did not look good...until...

The deafening roar of the crowd was only eclipsed by the yelling and screaming of me and my idiot friends. The pure joy in that one moment was monumental. One of the greatest plays in Super Bowl history...and the Patriots did it when it was needed most. 

2. SUPER BOWL LI: Patriots vs. Falcons

The greatest comeback in Super Bowl history was a roller coaster of emotions for us poor Patriots fans. Tom Brady, unjustifiably suspended. Injuries all year. Just once, can't we catch a break? No, we had to go down 28-3 and claw our way back to the most improbable victory in football...ever. Was it worth all the stress of the first 3 quarters to come back and win the FIFTH Lombardi Trophy in the only ovetime game in Super Bowl history?

1. SUPER BOWL XXXVI: Patriots vs. Rams

But this one...this one here is my favorite one. Huddled once again at my aunt's house...drinking...swearing...screaming...hoping for once the sad sack Patriots, the team I've been following during the dark days of 1-15 and Hugh Millen could finally turn it around against the Rams. Who at the time were the best, unstoppable force in football (sounds oddly familiar). When Vinatieri lined up for that potential game winning kick, everyone in the house joined hands. And the kick was good. The cheer from the crowd in that living room was so loud it caused my sister's toddler son to bawl his eyes out and most likely cause irreparable damage to his hearing. But we didn't care. It was the best. We were finally winners. And it started the greatest dynasty in sports history. 

IT'S GOOD! IT'S GOOD!

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